Open forum for parents and teachers. We want to hear from those who have had expereinces at The Child School. Please share your stories for the benefit of past, present, and future families, students, & staff members
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Hi, Just wanting to test out the easiness of leaving a comment and.......to thank the person who has put so much time into setting up this blog. As we know from LDResources.....it is a much needed source of communication! Thanks, Tom
I just found this blog on LD Resouces and I am so glad to have a forum that is dedicated to TCS/Legacy only.
My child's experience at TCS/Legacy was good and bad. The good part was the small size of the classes and the staff members who were professional and caring. The physical setting is lovely. There were several teachers who insisted on teaching real content in spite of Maari's attempts to stop them. They were courageous educators. Many of them are gone now.
The bad part was the lack of IEP mandated services, the unprofessional, brutal and damaging things that Maari said and did to my child and the staff members who fell in lockstep with Maari's abuses. My child's circle of friends spent a lot of time discussing the deficits of the academic program, Maari yelling at staff and students and feeling inadequate because of things Maari said and did to them.
I am hoping more people will come and post. Let's have an intelligent discussion about this - whatever your perspective is.
Oh and by the way, I did send a detailed account of what happened to my kid to Tom Ott. I suggest that any of you who have had problems with IEP mandates not being met or other problems, abuses etc. do the same. E-mail him at Tomoto2@aol.com. Tom has assured me that he will keep my info confidential and I trust him. I'm sure you can too.
Dear Tom and those on this e mail list: First of all Tom, I hope that you and your family are doing well. It has been a while since we last spoke. As you may know, I have remained active at TCS within the parents' association both on the steering committee as well as on the fundraising committee. At the time you resigned last year, as I am sure you will recall, I had reached out to you to meet with you and/or engage in some lengthy conversation(s) regarding your experiences and thoughts, both positive and negative, in order that incoming parents such as myself could appreciate those issues and move toward seeking improvements in any necessary areas. You advised me that at that juncture you were extremely involved in your daughter's transition from TCS and would not have time for any extended discussions although you directed me to the proposed by laws and some prior steering committee meeting minutes. It appears that now, however, you have plenty of spare time and again I offer you the opportunity to address any issues that you feel may benefit the students at TCS. Some of those receiving copies of this e mail may find it surprising that there is a current, involved parent willing to listen to issues and even if appropriate raise topics at future steering committee meetings if in fact constructive issues that will benefit our children can be addressed. After all Tom, we have always professed to have the children's best interests as our sole focal point and thus again I offer a platform for issue discussions. As an attorney, I value so deeply the process in which one can express one's views and criticisms in a professional and positive manner. Needless to say, I would not be taking the time to furnish these thoughts if I did not truly value that process and everyone's right to be heard especially if there can be a benefit to my child or any other child or person with or without special needs.
With that said, I would like to bring you up to date on what a wonderful year we have enjoyed at TCS. First of all, thanks to the arduous efforts of our predecessors such as you Tom, the steering committee has met and enjoyed a tremendously successful initial meeting. We actually had a 100% turnout. Every single issue we discussed was not only decided by consensus, if I remember a very important facet of your prior leadership, but with unanimity as well. It is just unbelievable how open, caring, and expressive the parents associated with the steering committee have been. The fact that we enjoyed such a great turnout is well reflective of how well this year's parents association can expect to function. We have accomplished so much, so quickly, it is truly difficult to comprehend. Again, without the trail blazers before us, positive results would be so much more difficult to achieve.
Apart from our turnout, we have worked very hard in advising all members of the parents association that they are not only welcomed, but are encouraged to attend the steering committee meetings. Maari was kind enough to provide me with a forum to discuss same at curriculum night which was again an unbelievable success. Not only was the gymnasium packed, but the parents association had the opportunity to present our general philosophy and goals for the upcoming year. Advanced notices of the steering committee meetings are now published well in advance and in different venues to encourage as much participation and parent input as possible. With Maari and the staff's support, this, in my opinion, led to what might have been the most successful first event in the history of the parents' association.
Tom, you may find this hard to believe, but the Oktoberfest celebration for the kids attracted over 40 parent volunteers. When Maari allowed us to address the parents as a group and seek volunteers for our various events, never in a million years, would I have expected such a response for an event held during business working hours. The TCS student population had a blast and even though we ran into a snag initially over the process of placing the initial orders for the event, the smiles on the kids' faces certainly made up for any inconveniences (incidentally, we have already added to the next steering committee's agenda a discussion on appropriation issues so that we will finally have a written policy and guideline as to future events in order to avoid any other snafus).
At curriculum night, we also learned of the wonderful changes that Maari and the staff have effectuated for the students. After the success the parents' association had with last year's phon a thon, as advertised, we were able to open the media lab. The state of the art equipment and the response of the students who have been introduced to the media lab is phenomenal. Maari would even like to initiate a TCS radio station. From the students I have talked to, there is a great deal of excitement regarding the development of the media lab. So many of the students love movies, believe that they can broadcast or direct, and have other strong interests in what the media lab can develop. Thus, I was able to announce at curriculum night that this year's phon a thon will again seek to raise funds to improve the media lab.
Tom, you timing is impeccable. With such a strong list of parents and supporters of TCS which this e mail can reach, I would like to divert for just a moment and address that forum. With a selfless plug, this year's phon a thon will be run the week of October 22nd. Consequently, anyone who wishes to help the parents association raise money for the school in a non controversial fashion (the only benefit will be to the children who can truly use a fully equipped media lab and benefit from other worthy projects), please feel free to hop on board. You can e mail me, and I will be happy to attach a form for any current parent whose child is willing to (or can be convinced) to participate.
By means of background, the phon a thon became an idea raised out of the parents association's fundraising committee. It was entirely devised by parents and presented to the staff and administration who welcomed the idea with open arms. This will be the third phon a thon. With the help of the specialists, teachers, administration and parents, it is the only event at TCS which truly intimately involves every branch of the TCS family. After all, who is going to say no to a child from TCS who makes the effort to solicit contributions for his/her benefit? The idea is for the parents to contact friends and family members by providing a list of names and phone numbers to a child's home room teacher. The child will then call those individuals on the list during a specific time during the week of October 22nd. These participants guarantee that every call will result in a positive response. There are no "cold" solicitations.
There has been a great deal of emphasis placed on advising parents that it is not the number of people a child will call or the amount of the contribution that will make a difference. Rather, we seek to include as many students as possible in order that they can share in the wonderful sense of accomplishment and giving that is so vital in our society. Thus, even if a child makes one call to one parent or guardian for $5, that child is treated with as much encouragement and support as any other child in the process.
Meanwhile, educationally and socially, all of the staff and specialists work at having students create a suitable script (writing), practice phone etiquette if necessary, involve the students with tallying the responses (math), work on articulation for the phone call, develop a strong sense of teamwork, etc. Tom, thank you so much for providing such an easy forum to reach out to right before the event. If anyone on this list does not have a student currently enrolled, but would like to participate, you can e mail me your name and phone number and I would be honored to have my son contact you Wednesday morning October 24th. The students who participate have a ball planning, calling and totaling the contributions. Anyone who would like to assist, is certainly welcome. Incidentally, we are well ahead of last year's pace in terms of participants and once again the school has been unbelievably cooperative in providing publicity and assistance for the phon a thon. It is such a wonderful experience when everyone works so well together for the benefit of the children.
Tom, there are so many other exciting changes and developments at TCS I would like to share with everyone. Unfortunately, I took testimony all day today and will be doing so all week. I had written up to about this point last evening when my home system crashed and thus I had to start again whenever I took a short break. However, your comments are certainly important enough for me to comment further upon with respect to at least some of the other developments.
At curriculum night all of the parents were exposed to the wonderful developments at TCS. I know I will be omitting several items, but from foreign language options including Spanish and Japanese to the purchasing of new maps and globes, to the highly successful art and music departments, to yoga and the school store, to the technology classes and advancements, and to even a course in travel training, our children continue to thrive with the opportunities to advance themselves in such a broad and diverse academic and nurturing way. The opportunity for these children to grow not just academically, which one can attain in any proper educational institution, but socially and emotionally, where so many of the students struggle or demonstrate deficits, is just wonderful.
Tom, since you left, the school decided to institute a parent survey to obtain even more input as to parents' concerns. The reaction to the input has been phenomenal. I believe you were intimately involved (if not I am having a senior moment and it was a concern of other prior steering committee members) with the issue of communication vis a vis parents/parents, parents/teachers, and administration/parents. The changes that have occurred would absolutely warm your heart and bring a huge smile to your face.
First of all, as you recall, Maari had instituted a program under which parents could call into teachers or specialists at a given time. This system was the focus of constructive criticism (there is such an avenue clearly available at TCS for those who take the time to follow proper avenues) amongst a large number of parents. I know that you may find this to be an even more amazing development, but Maari announced at curriculum night that she had taken those comments to heart and even though she expressed reservations over the suggestions, agreed to adopt an e mail communication system for parents and teachers to utilize. A parent can still call the school to discuss issues, but now will also have an e mail forum which so many parents had sought. Just as significantly, the protocol or policy statement associated with the e mail system has been entrusted to the parents by referring the issue to the steering committee. I and other members of the committee will encourage all parents to join in the discussion and we will, hopefully before the holidays, provide the school with a written policy. Thereafter, designated parents will meet with the staff and make any necessary changes to allow the implementation of the system to be applied fairly and judiciously in order to bring about the best possible result in increasing communications between parents and teachers.
Also, I hope that you have had the opportunity to review the new school website. Needless to say, we have picked up the torch with regard to communication issues and carried it a long way. Our parent directory is now complete and parents can communicate with other parents so much more easily than ever before. Also, Tom, another development in this arena was the appointment of class parents who turned out in high numbers to support that system as well. The class parents and coordinators are working wonderfully this year in improving communications and keeping parents abreast of classroom developments. Yet, this is only one year removed from facing serious problems of parent apathy and a lack of filling all the class parent positions.
The parent survey brought about yet another wonderful development. Parents, as you probably know, had concerns over the method utilized for specialist treatment. Although Maari had preferred an integrated system, many parents asked for a more traditional approach. You will very pleased to know that Tom that once again Maari agreed to accept parental input and opportunities for individual specialist sessions are once again afforded. In other words Tom, as has always been my experience at TCS, even if I disagreed with the approach or a decision as to my child, the staff and administration will always opt for the course of action that best suits the individual need of the child.
I also want to let everyone know who may no longer be affiliated with TCS about Maari's open hours. The program was commenced last academic school year to foster even more parental input by allowing regularly scheduled individual or group discussion sessions with Maari. The program was a stunning success although I wish more parents would have taken advantage of the opportunity to attend.
Maari allowed and in fact insisted on the parents setting the agenda and raising subjects for discussion that they wished to address. I only attended the middle school sessions last year, but the extraordinary efforts Maari undertook to bring parents into the decision making process despite her unbelievably busy schedule was so much appreciated by those who attended. As just one example of how that process brought about a significant change, I will share with you one idea which came to fruition from those sessions. As undoubtedly everyone receiving this message will realize, the issue of socialization is paramount to the concerns of almost every parent with a child at TCS. In light of the New York State stringent requirements regarding obtaining a regents diploma, parents were very concerned that after struggling to foster friendships, a non regents student might not have any interaction with a regents student who he/she had befriended. Again, and I know this will bring a great big smile to your face, Maari adopted the parents suggestion lock, stock and barrel and agreed to house all 9th and 10th grade students at Patterson and all 11th and 12th grade students at Island House. Once again, the openness and cooperation amongst the staff, administration and parents has never been greater and just look at the results of the new and improved relationships; simply amazing. More and most importantly, it is the kids who have and will benefit from this type of dialogue and approach which is all that really matters in the end. I might add parenthetically that from my personal suggestions, I am probably running at about a 40% acceptance rating with Maari which in all honesty would have led me toward a career with the New York Yankees if this correlated to my high school or post high school batting average, but I am very, very satisfied with these results as a mere parent who was thereby forced to forego a lucrative sports career and become a lawyer instead.
I know I can go on and on about all the wonderful developments at TCS and within the parents association already this year, but at some stage I would like to return to my law practice and spend some time with my son before he goes to bed. However, I certainly wanted to respond to your individual inquiries.
You mentioned change which as a student leader and remnant of the 60's will always be an issue close at heart. Needless to say, there have been wonderful changes at TCS this year, only some of which I have mentioned in this reply. Certainly, there is room for improvement and with more creative and positive input all of us who have some role at the school will always seek to provide a forum for new ideas and positive changes. Again, I offer you or any other concerned individual a forum to discuss issues and ideas and to the extent that the present steering committee or other forum may wish to pursue those constructive ideas and suggestions, quite frankly, I will seek out such a forum. After all, and although I only speak for myself and not for any other parent or committee member, I and all of my present colleagues only wish to provide the best for our children. Any idea from any source which can further that goal, when raised in a proper, ethical, and appropriate manner will always have my ear.
You also mentioned turnover. I am very happy to report, and I know that you will be just as delighted to learn, that the turnover issue from at least my perspective is not an existing issue this year. Again, speaking from only my area of knowledge, which would be the middle school, we lost one co teacher who is seeking to further his educational pursuits toward a higher degree on a full time basis. I also know that the science teacher left the middle school, but fortunately she is now once again teaching my son and she has been assigned to the high school. I find this to be a very fortunate change of circumstances as my son loves science and absolutely thrives with this innovative and extremely involved teacher. Again, perhaps there has been turnover issues that I am unaware of, but I have seen nothing out of the ordinary in my personal experiences at TCS and also believe that there is far less turnover than what my son experienced in a very high priced main stream private school or during the years he attended a main stream parochial school for that matter as well.
As to your astute summary of leadership abilities, I believe I have demonstrated, and trust me if I had the time I could add several more pages of examples, of a school director who has fostered a partnership of corroboration amongst parents, staff and administrators. In fact, Maari, who you may have unintentionally omitted from your message by name, but whom I assume was the subject of certain pejorative remarks, has instilled this vision amongst her staff. I cannot even put into words what a pleasure it was to work with Tina who was the head of the middle school while I was the middle school parent liaison last year. Tina's support and vision to bring the principles of Mel Levine and the school's vision to implement those standards in a creative, cutting edge manner has to be applauded by even the most circumspect parent. I am truly sorry Tom that your daughter graduated just at a time when the level of cooperation, "collaboration and constructive input and ideas" have permeated the TCS family with such wonderful results as set forth herein. Yet I know that you take pride in learning that so many of your wishes and hopes have come to life.
As to your request to "state specifics and identify yourself" I hope that I have met your requirements in this reply. Again, I can certainly offer many more examples of leadership at all levels and amongst all categories at TCS which have arisen and led "effectively via a strength-based, positive, honest and supportive approach." Again, you will be so happy to note that your wishes are alive and well with so many concrete examples as set forth herein and elsewhere (incidentally how great is the updated web site with issues of What Every Parent Needs to Know, upcoming events, etc.)
Finally, you listed four general areas from which you are "presently compiling and categorizing documentation." Firstly, I know of no instances of verbal, emotional, psychological intimidation or abuse of any student at TCS, but thanks for asking. As a lawyer and officer of the court, I would not hesitate for a second in reporting any such occurrence. On the other hand, the improvement in my son's self esteem and sense of worth, which I see in so many of his friends at TCS, has been nothing short of miraculous. To think that my son began taking the subway independently this summer without incident, has kept possession of and used his cell phone judiciously and appropriately, has managed to keep his metro card funded, etc., all at the age of 14, is so warmly appreciated, I cannot even begin to put into words what a wonderful success story I have been able to monitor in terms of self esteem. My son has always responded extremely well to positive reinforcement and so poorly to aversive discipline. I emphasized this fact with Maari in my school interview. After my son was rendered so ill from a devastating, insidious disease which he contracted, he needed a nurturing environment under which his sense of self worth and accomplishment could flourish. With my son, academics has never been an issue with the exception of math. However, issues of self-esteem are very close to me and I could not be more grateful for what TCS has done for my child. My son, my wife, and I are truly blessed by the caring, sensitive, and nurturing environment at TCS.
Secondly, I know of no instance of any abusive interactions with a parent, guardian or staff member. Thirdly, I know of no instances of non-compliance with any service mandate set forth in a student's IEP. Finally, although I truly would like to share so many other relevant examples you have sought in your closing remarks, the hour is late and my son awaits me. Tom, thank you again so much for the opportunity to address these issues and I hope to speak to you real soon about any constructive suggestions you might wish for me to address. Sincerely, Gary Rome
Thanks for your comment, Gary Rome, Attorney, as you pointed out numerous times in your post. Surely, you realize that the powers-that-be are smart enough not to "mess" with your child, or with you, for that matter. Your Child School experience is protected by your position and your loquaciousness. As for so many wonderful changes in so short a period of time...my guess is that because there is now an awareness of a growing group of angry parents on the trail, we will be seeing impeccable behavior and compliance for a while.
Best of luck on your idyllic TCS experience. Have you bothered to read the experiences of other Child School parents on the LD Resources site? Based on my personal experience, and the experience of many other posters, my guess is that in addition to being used, you are being snookered. There is a long history there of catering to the child with an "elite" parent. Beware. As they say...if something looks too good to be true...it probably is.
On what planet or in which dimension is your TCS? I'm sure my daughter would have had a much more positive experience if she went to TCS there.
With all your experiences and involvement you NEVER heard of parents and students who were dissatisfied with the school? Have you gone to the LD site and read the posts there? And we are suppose to take your extremely long, pollyanna post seriously?
I apologize for being so hostile but I couldn't believe what I was reading. With all my heart I hope your experience at TCS is as positive as you claim.
First, let me preface this message by writing that I was not requested by TCS to write this. Some people are under the misguided notion that if someone writes something positive about Maari or the school that we were requested to do so. I am writing this because I was on the recipient listing along with the other 190 people Tom sent an email to. Hmm…I thought that when we provided our personal information to the school, it was only suppose to be used for directly related school info.
My child was at TCS for quite a few years. However, voluntarily we placed him in another school. This wasn’t due to Maari or the school. We were not asked to leave. My son required additional help that the school could not provide. No school is perfect and instead of blaming the school or Maari, I accepted the fact that it had to do with my son’s issues. Maari helped him to make the transition by calling him into her office and talking to him about the change he was about to make because he did not want to leave The Child School.
Over the years, I always had my son involved with various therapies outside of the school. Under the law, a student is not to be removed from their class for too much time (i.e. being pull out for services) if it is going to interfere with their education. For children without special needs, it is like having a tutor after school. Just because a student is not doing well in a subject does not mean that it is the school’s fault. You wouldn’t remove your child from the school – you supplement it with what they require.
Many parents need to remind themselves that when they had no other placement, Maari accepted their child. This was not due to few openings at other schools but due to the fact that the other schools had rejected the student. She is willing to work with them. For students who were asked to find other placements, it was usually because TCS could not provide the help that the student required. If she kept the student at TCS, she would be doing not only the parents a disservice but more importantly, the student.
Many of the parents who have written something on this thread, their children are now in college. Wouldn’t you consider that a success story? There are many other parents like me who are (were) happy with the school. They are not bothering to write anything because their child is happy and making progress at the school. They are being taught by dedicated teachers and staff which is what a good school is all about.
Parents who no longer have their child at the school, it is time to move on and spend your energy where it should be – helping your child at the present time.
I am quite happy for you and your son that the TCS experience has been so positive. As a previous parent noted in her post..you never know what the future can hold in regard to your interaction with Maari so beware. One of the consistent threads communicated to me by professionals in the field about Maari is that….all is OK until all is not OK. And, after having truly given her the benefit of my doubt over the years she (Maari) has convinced me that this is true.
A lengthy point-by-point response to your e-mail to me, which has now doubled as your posting on LDResources, is not my intention or desire. I know what I have contributed and what I tried to contribute to the school and Maari, parents and staff know that as well. TCS / LHS was the 4th school that I had been involved in on behalf of my daughter. Trying to do what I can to contribute and help in the schools she has attended has been a consistent thread for me. I was quite involved in the PTA of her pre-school, co-chaired the PTA in her public elementary school and also was on the PTA of the school she attended prior to TCS / LHS. The collaborative work with those principals, parents and school staff was not perfect and there was healthy disagreement at times, but everyone was willing and able to move forward together…..and….we did!
Maari has led me to my decision to do what I can on behalf of students, parents / families and staff. Nothing you or anyone else may say to defend her and/or denigrate me will convince me otherwise. I have seen too much and I have heard too much (from a wide variety of parents, staff and students). And, as you pointed out in your e-mail, I now have some time to be able to devote to it.
I wish you continued good luck with TCS and your son’s education there. Maybe he will be one of the lucky ones who receives the type of education he is entitled to and deserves. Maari will make sure that he receives all the mandated services he is supposed to receive based on his IEP, as well as insure that he will not be addressed in an abusive, condescending and ego-deflating manner. And….I know why she will insure that, as you sound like you represent her more than she represents herself. Again, good luck. Tom
I have read some of the recent comments and wish to address just a few issues. First and foremost, all of my personal activity is geared toward furthering the interests of those students at TCS. I have no agenda, nor do I care about the source of any constructive ideas as to additional programs or activities that the parents association can consider to benefit the children. As I mentioned to Tom Ott, you have a forum to provide creative suggestions and programs you may believe might be helpful. As this will probably be my last comment in this forum, if Tom is willing to summarize those ideas and e mail me at work, I would be happy to raise any or all of the concrete, positive suggestions for future consideration.
Secondly, as many may not realize, I raised no personal attacks as to Tom or anyone else for that matter. If anyone ever attended any High School PA meeting that Tom organized, one could never deny the tremendous effort he extended in finding relevant topics and speakers. I hate to speak for anyone else, but I cannot imagaine any parent who did not walk away with a wealth of helpful information from any of those meetings and although my time with Tom on the steering committee was too short, I enjoyed our exchanges even though we are certainly on as opposite a position as possible as to our evaluations of TCS.
Accordingly, if Tom is willing, I would be happy to read over any positive suggestions he or anyone reading this comment may have that would benefit the children. Experessing displeasure with attorneys (I have many great self deprecating lawyer jokes which I will save for another time), hoping that the phon a thon will end without another alternative to raise self esteem, phone skills, etc (again this was totally parent created), believing that all the wonderful changes were in response to the current waive of angry parents (these changes arose from hard work and planning which began no later than last year and often earlier), believing that I or others who try to bring about positive changes are snookered and brainwashed, asserting that because we are commencing our fifth year at TCS does not qualify me to comment (I absolutely admit I do not have all or even close to a majority of suggestions as to how we can institute additional changes to benefit the children), or believing that the empirical information I provided such as the new programs, parent attendance and participation, etc. is simply a total fabrication and never occurred, simply does not allow me to consider well founded, positive suggestions as to new programs or activities which can benefit the children. Consequently, from herein, I will defer to all others for comments, although if it helps someone to vent and issue personal attacks as to myself or viewpoints, please feel free; it is far less than what I face in my (I won’t mention by name) carreer. Tom, I hope that you or others take the opportunity to gather concrete suggestions which I and of course other involved parents can consider. I hope that irrespective of our opposite viewpoints, for the sake of the children, we can create a forum for a free expression of ideas for programs or events which will bring about even more beneficial change and advancement than we have accomplished so far. There is always room for improvement and if something positive and beneficial to the children can arise from the issues that have been raised herein, we will all be better served. Gary Rome
My name is John Fisher. My son Thomas, diagnosed with PDD when he was 3, attended TCS/LHS beginning in kindergarten and continuing through 10th grade. Thanks in no small part to Maari and TCS/LHS, he now attends an academically rigorous college prep boarding school in Connecticut where he is doing very well academically and socially. He did not leave TCS/LHS because of any dissatisfaction with the school on his or his mother's or my part. He left because Maari's and the school's success with him enabled him to move ahead.
The reason I'm adding my voice to this dialog is because I'm disturbed, leery of hidden agendas I know nothing about, and, frankly, creeped out that it's taking place at all.
When Thomas's mother and I were looking for a school for Thomas, we visited several schools that are designed to serve the needs of kids with developmental and neurological problems like his. Each of these schools had a unique environment. Our mood while searching for the right school for Thomas could best be described as one of desperation because he wasn't speaking or showing signs of progressing towards speaking. We decided that TCS would be a wonderful place for him based almost entirely on talking to Maari. When we decided that TCS was the best place for Thomas, we had already gotten a sense of the school's philosophy and way of operating, as well as a sense of what kind of person and director Maari is, and we feel that the sense we received then has been more than validated over the years. We were thrilled that our son was accepted there. Certainly we have never regretted his attending TCS/LHS. In fact I shudder to think where Thomas would be without having had the benefit of the unique insights and caring, comprehensive nurture that Maari and the school afforded him. Maari took a chance on Thomas, even though he still wasn't speaking when he started TCS at 5. Thanks to her and the wonderful teachers and staff at the school working under her direction, during his time at TCS/LHS, Thomas learned to talk, to read and write, to study and communicate his ideas well enough to take Regents, aim for college and, currently, thrive in a demanding boarding school environment.
I have had considerable experience with schools that are organized around specific missions and needs. What I have seen, again and again, is that the best of them have been very much the product of their founder's and/or director's passionate vision. Certainly Maari is a person with a passionate vision - one of the best I have ever encountered. Does she follow exactly the same path that other heads of school may follow? Thank God the answer is no. But who among us didn't realize that upon first meeting her? It's not as if she makes any secret about the way she operates. What has always impressed me more than anything about her is that she gets our kids; she sees right into their minds and souls, and she responds to them in ways that almost always work. Is she perfect? I'm sure she'd be the first to tell you that she isn't. BUT, does she deserve our respect and admiration? In my book she always will.
I think that all of us responding to this issue share something with each other. There isn't one of us who hasn't struggled in ways that people who don't have our kids' particular set of issues and problems can only guess at. At times it's been so hard for me that I've become angry. Angry at who? God maybe. Angry that life for me and Thomas and the rest of our family couldn't be easier . . . more hopeful. Angry that it has to be the way it is. I suppose that I, not unlike many people I know, have even at times looked for a scapegoat - someone else I could blame and direct my anger at. Good people, I'm not a mind reader, but I'm telling you that I have to wonder if something like scapegoating isn't going on here. If so, it should stop. Certainly, none of us with an ounce of gratitude for what Maari and the school have afforded our kids would be wise to get caught up in someone else's personal issue.
I hope that all of us can find ways not to engage in innuendoes and, instead of giving in to negative impulses, think about positive ways we can support Maari and TCS/LHS.
I firmly believe that the move to Roosevelt Island overwhelmed Maari in a way that no one could have imagined. The doors were spread open, and a whole population of teen-agers were admitted with whom she had little experience. Her concern for the "youngsters", as she calls them, is uncontested. Her ability to deal with today's young adult teenagers is where I feel her training and her experience fail her. And to refer to my 17-year-old as a "youngster"...and to deal with him as if he were a "youngster"...doesn't work. The elementary school experience, the middle school experience was fine. The high school -- now THAT is where a change should be made.
Firstly, I've always been able to and consistently have met privately with staff and educators, without the director, to discuss the progress of my child. I’ve had personal, phone and email dialogues with teachers and staff related to problems with my child. I’ve also met privately with the director. I have always been able to voice my concerns AND DEMANDS openly without fear of retribution or a hint, at least to me, of intimidation. I certainly don't agree with the original commentary. I have found my son’s treatment by the staff, educators and administrators to be exemplary. I feel he is in a safe, beneficial and nurturing environment. I have heard some dissatisfactions with and criticisms of the school, staff and director. I am not always entirely thrilled with the choices made by those at the school. Many criticisms are clearly understandable yet such are limited to the anecdotal and so far have not evidenced to me any endemic, institutional, negligent behavior on the part of Maari, the staff or teachers. To the contrary, overall commentary has been extremely positive even from those who are less "loquacious", powerful or "elite". I am saddened by the present vitriol and personal attacks and yet hope that from this muddied stew a fruitful repast might arise.
I do question how a blog on the one hand can be established with the credo: "It is meant to give a voice to all those who she intimated [sic] and refused to keep the welfare of the child as the priority." and yet claim that "It is not meant to unfairly "bash" the director." I am a voice with a valid knowledge based opinion who has NOT been intimidated and has not had a sense that there has been any refusal to keep my child's welfare as a priority. Am I still welcome? I sense an inconsistency and a definite agenda other than the welfare of the students of TCS/LHS. Perchance some axes to grind from some past perceived transgressions? I sense a campaign to hang Maari from the nearest yardarm or maybe a transfer to Guantanamo to counteract all the evils in the world.
I would prefer that both negative and laudatory critiques be welcomed for the purpose of elevating the school or at least for the purpose of positively affecting our children's education and the forum not be used to gather evidence for some "Frankenstein” anonymous mob by torchlight procession to pillory the school or its director.
To respond to some of the comments and e-mails I have received I wanted to post parts of my previous entries on the blog:
Post#31 Some might ask why I have not looked into other schools. To those people I would answer……..”You then do not know that there are too few educational resources for the number of children who require better special educational services than the NYC Dept. Of Education can offer. That is why this Director can continue as she has been doing for this many years
Given the size of the school at this time (250 or so students) it is clear that a “healthy” administration would foster the decision-making process of designated staff based on a clear philosophy and accountability structure.
Post#36 There is a very real, concrete and identifiable “thread” that connects the many negative comments. That “thread” is the Director, Maari de Souza. Maari was a pioneer in her time, 25 or so years ago when she started the school, and there is no doubt that she is a very bright and determined person.
There have been (and are) many talented professional and non-professional support staff in the school. At this point in time I firmly believe that the gifted staff who are there will not be there for long (turnover is an issue in any school but……at TCS/LHS I believe it is a much more significant issue) and that many of those who were there, left as a result of being treated in a disrespectful, degrading and condescending manner.
The Board of Directors has a real and significant responsibility to the present and future students and they do not appear to have intervened in any significant manner. “Exit Interviews” of departing staff are a standard in schools that are committed to quality service. The “Board” should be conducting them, at the very least interviewing staff that have remained at least 1 year. They should be confidential and held after letters of recommendation have been provided to the staff person, as fear of getting a good reference can impact on honest feedback.
The school needs to go on, especially given how few options exist for students with these types of learning challenges. But……Maari’s “style” and behavior are common enough knowledge at this point in time for there to be a clear recognition that someone else needs to take the helm.
Post#104 WE (present and former parents, present and former staff and students) are now rising up to communicate our concerns in the hope that the Board will do SOMETHING to change how the school is administered and, at the very least to reign in Maari and hold her accountable or ….. WE will need to go further….Time will tell.
Post#185 I think that most of the posts that have been critical are focused on Maari, not the quality of the teaching, clinical or support staff. Most concerns stated are in relation to staff retention and the appropriate utilization of clinical support staff. This is very important to be clear about.
(I agree with everyone who believes that TCS needs to go on and to move on. What we may disagree about is Maari continuing to lead the school.
I plan to provide the documentation that I accumulate to the proper oversight, regulatory and auditing bodies. THEY will determine their validity and decide whether to investigate further. THEY will make their assessment and recommendations based on this. I feel very clear in what I need to do and I respect the follow-up that will result. If these various allegations and incidents are deemed credible what will occur is a result of what Maari has or has not done, not what any one other person has or has not done. I will end with the following from a previous post.)
Post#195 Your individual experience (as well as those of some other families) may not be reflective of the whole. As I was told by those “in the know” (those professionals in the field of special education resources)…..everyhting is OK until it is not…..or….in other words….until you have a significant disagreement with Maari. Maybe you have been lucky and, for your child’s and your sake, I hope that your luck holds out until graduation. Wishing you…the best! Tom
My name is Annette Berkowitz, and my son is currently attending his 5th year at TCS, Upper Elementary. I am responding to Tom Ott' s email.
My son started TCS, diagnosed as ADHD, & PDD: a hyperactive, anxiety-ridden child, unable to learn in environments where he was bullied, unable to express or assert himself, and unable to have or maintain friendships. I remember very vividly the pangs of pain I felt when he came home from his old school, knowing in my heart that he was slipping more and more behind academically, and especially emotionally and socially. It was a tough, long road to find the right school for him. I am grateful, every single day, that he was accepted at TCS.
At TCS, my son has been flourishing in every way. From Day One, when he was afraid to go into his classroom, and sat on a bench for a while outside Maari's office, his life changed. I remember our joy, the very first month at TCS when my son finally started to read. It's hard to describe, and painful to remember! Nor will I forget the first year we sent him on the yearly 10-day Spring trip overseas when he was 8, his acute anxiety on the way to the airport, and then barely saying goodbye to me when he saw Maari's face at the airport!! In Maari, he found an educator and a mentor, someone he loves and relies on to guide him not only in his academic learning, but also in his life learning. At TCS, my son has found a supportive and nurturing environment where he has felt safe enough to learn, to make friends and to grow.
As to Maari, I have profound admiration for her. From my direct experience, and my contact with other parents at the school, it is a very well known fact that Maari is very hands-on, knows every single child inside and out, and is demanding of the staff because of her exacting standards for the same level of passion, caring and commitment to our kids. While I have heard parents complain and disagree with Maari, there is one unquestionable fact that everyone agrees on and respects: her passion, caring and unwavering commitment to our kids. Maari is not infallible, but to think of Maari as abusive to the kids is preposterous and out-of-character.
Thanks to Maari, and the amazing staff at TCS/LHS, the school has grown and expanded, and, it has become increasingly difficult to maintain the same level of hands-on management than was possible earlier. I see that Maari is well aware of her limitations, and seems to struggle with the balance that she needs to set, in order to perpetuate the quality of TCS/LHS with the demands of growth and expansion of the school. No school is perfect, and this is an ongoing process of growth, that we, as parents need to nurture, help and assist, for our kids.
In my effort to give something back to the school for what its giving my son, this year, I have joined the Parent Association Steering Committee. There is a lot of trial and error, but the PA has gotten off to a fantastic start, as it hopes to become a viable vehicle through which an expanding parent body can navigate, be heard and respected, and support Maari and the staff, for the benefit of our kids. Gary Rome eloquently described in his email, all of the exciting changes going on at TCS/LHS. This is what I am looking forward to hearing more of!
Between the comments here and the e-mail flying in response to Tom's e-mail, I find this to be absolutely fascinating.
Having been at TCS/Legacy long enough to have seen a lot, I can't imagine that any parent who has been there for a year or more hasn't heard about or witnessed Maari's inappropriate & abusive behavior.
Most of us parents have been complicit with the abuses until now because:
1. We felt powerless to do anything about it, or 2. We were satisfied with what our child was receiving and chose not to speak up on behalf of the suffering of other children.
Until now those who tried to do something in a vacuum were only effective in removing their children from the school but not at stopping the abuses at the school.
I am glad to hear from parents who are happy with what their children have received from TCS/Legacy but frankly, some of the e-mails strike me as being disingenuous.
NO MATTER HOW GOOD IT WAS FOR YOUR CHILD HOW CAN YOU NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THE SUFFERING AND DAMAGE TO THE CHILDREN FOR WHOM IT WAS NOT SO GOOD? I'd like to hear from some of you about that. What should be done about that?
Are you going to go on record and say that the parents and staff members who spoke from their hearts on LDResources about the bad stuff that goes on at TCS/Legacy were lying?
Dammit people, wake up!!! This discussion is ABOUT KIDS first and foremost. IS IT OKAY IF YOUR KID WAS TREATED WELL AND MINE WAS ABUSED? If your answer is yes, then keep pontificating. IF YOUR ANSWER IS NO, THEN LET'S HAVE A SERIOUS DISCUSSION ABOUT WHAT CAN BE DONE TO STOP THE PATTERN OF ABUSE.
This seems to me to be a tempest in a tea pot. We as parents all know how concern for our children can color our perceptive. We worry. I toke my son to the Developmentalist today. She told me she had several patients that go to the child school and how well they all prosper at TCS. Now this is not the first time a private doctor or therapist has said this to me. From my own experience I can tell you that my children have grown and prospered at the Child School. Is it the perfect place for Every child, every parent? Maybe not, but that is where as parents we have to make the tough calls. I have meet parents who removed their child because the school did not meet the needs of the child, and having said that I can also say they had nothing bad to say about the school. They felt there was something their child need that the school could not provide. Fair enough. This issue seems to be more about tar and feathering than anything constructive.
Maari is the school director not Henry Kissinger. She does not always have the patients to hold and coddle the parents and staff. They are adults.She never seems to lack the understanding and time for the children. That my friends is the bottom line. Quite frankly she can disagree with me, she can yell at me and call me all kinds of a fool if she so wanted to. The bottom line is that the children are happy. They are learning. Their development both socially and scholastically can not be questioned. If you truly disagree with that opinion then you have the right and the responsibility to find a constructive solution for yourself and your child.Work with the school, other parents and staff, add outside therapy, ect. Those are really your only choices short of finding a new school. This witch hunt mentality does not does not seem to help if anything it is behaviour we would not condone in our children.
To be clear……When you are talking about allegations of abuse (verbal, psychological and emotional, primarily) the “action” then needs to be targeted specifically.
I can only speak for myself in saying that……I am not trying to “scapegoat” anyone…..it is a needed action to address allegations related to children, teens and staff.
Reporting these allegations (as well as other, less important issues related to educational rights) to the proper authorities will lead to an investigation and determination.
No more needs to be said to explain the reasons for moving ahead.
I am absolutely amazed at the anger in some of the postings. I for one really like Maari. My son just started his 2nd year at TCS and I am so happy with everything. My son even went on the spring trip last year and will be going again this year. I am amazed that he willingly spent the night away from me and the family. He prefers the familiar and can become very anxious. The fact that he went on an *over-nighter* tells me that he is comfortable with his *school family*. That's quite an accomplishment for him and says a lot about TCS.
I think TCS is amazing and have had only good experiences.
Patti PS. On public forums, such as this, I do not use my last name in an attempt to protect my son's identity and to ensure his safety.
It maybe surprising to hear angry posts for a relative newcomer. To anyone who has been at the school for awhile its not so surprising. the anger grows out of frustration. It has been my experience that yes Ms. De Sousa will take on students with very involved issues. She does seem to thrive on the gratitude of anxious parents worn down by the school search.However if you don't have much to offer the school financially or if your child is not strong academically then her interest wanes ( sometimes quite quickly). To Glad my kid is outta there. The questionable and yes abusive treatment seems to just fly over the heads of the Director's supporters. Our ability to recognize their positive experiences lends more credences to our concerns.Where the mocking,condesending remarks ( Frankenstein mob!) have to make you wonder. The theme seems to be to take anything thats thrown at you and your child and buy into the benevolent tyrant line. Otherwise surely some one out there would express concern if not solidarity.
I am very happy that so many parents feel that their children have had positive experiences in TCS. My daughter had positive experiences too; however, they were overshadowed by too many of the negatives.
I realize many feel that this is a witch hunt or blame game against Maari. Maari is not being blamed for every bad thing that has happened to our children at TCS. However, there is a consistent thread of issues that involves Maari and that is the problem. And, yes, negative experiences will happen at any school, under any system.
Personally, I feel that the city and/or state should change the way they do oversite of all the private schools that accept funds (taxpayers’ money) to fulfill the IEP’s of public school students. While private schools are autonomous, provided they fulfill state curricular requirements, I feel they must be answerable for the treatment of the IEP students who attend them and of their families. The directors/principals of these private schools, (listed as non-public at the VESID site), should have the same accountability to their city’s school system as the public ones, if they are going to accept public funds.
There is a site for public school parents, by public school parents, called www.insideschools.org. Take a look at it. I wish there was something similar for private schools parents. I suspect that many private school students and parents have bad experiences that are swepted under the rug because of peer pressure (both student and parental) and due to the autonomy of these schools.
Response to parents regarding my suggestions and recommendations:
I have already outlined numerous times what I see (and what many others see) as the “fallout” related to Maari so there is no need to repeat any of those.
My intent is to support TCS /LHS and its’ continuation as an option for students and parents.
I will assume that you (who are asking) are serious and I will suggest a few things that, in my opinion, should be priorities to focus on:
1. The Board and PA should, at the very least, work to establish an interim administrative accountability and oversight plan to be in effect during the period of investigation and fact-finding. As noone can predict when this will occur, it will occur and will require much attention on the part of Maari. In addition, noone can predict what the end result will be, so if a plan is in place, there is always the option of its’ continuation, whether on a temporary or more permanent basis.
2. Generally, no matter “who” administrates, TCS / LHS needs to be able to functionally address the needs of the students that it has accepted into the school. Specifically, from what I have seen, there needs to be much focus and development in a few realms: a. MS and HS needs to be much more focused in their curriculum and training offerings as it relates to transition planning and to the post TCS/LHS life of the students. In my opinion (and, I am not an educator but do know the adult service options and systems for graduates) the curriculum should be geared for ALL students to attempt acquisition of a Regents or Regents Competency Diploma NOT an IEP Certificate. IEP Certificates can be issued for any student who cannot pass the Regents or RCT’s at any time up to the students 21st birthday school year. b. enhanced academic opportunities and supports for those who are pursuing Regents and Regents Competency Diplomas. This seems to be a present focus but staff need to be treated with respect and given positive support if any of the new opportunities are to really take hold. c. “true” transition-type supports and services for all students, based on their needs (Travel Training. Vocational Training / Internships / Externships) and REMEMBER….students with disabilities have a legal right to a free and appropriate education until age 21 so…….gearing the academic curriculum for Regents and RCT’s would not be wasting a student’s time even if they ultimately cannot achieve this. There should then be a period (18-21, maybe) when those students could have the focus be on vocational options, if the school feels that they can properly meet those needs. Students who think they are graduating with an academic diploma and DO NOT should not have to face much more limited options when they have used up valuable time at TCS/LHS. (P.S….Maari was quite upset with me when I first spoke to her about informing parents more clearly as to what an IEP Certificate meant. I was told it would only upset them. Well..what do YOU think is more upsetting to a parent? Some initial anxiety that leads to appropriate planning with knowledge and accurate information or finding out, almost after the fact, that valuable time and potential options for your child have been wasted? Yes, I agree with you!…..and because of that we made that type of information sharing a major part of the HS PA Meeting) Parents AND students should know where they are headed and what the choices are. If a student does not have the ability to pass the Regents and RCT’s one option may be to attend a private school that is not governed by that NYS requirement. I know that this may be easier for financially well-off families but there are also scholarships available that those with limited incomes might be able to look into as well. There are also some very good vocational transition programs that are sponsored by the NYC DOE and students and parents could access those as well BUT NOT if it is too late, age-wise.
My experience of TCS / LHS has been MS and HS, as my daughter attended other schools prior, so I cannot comment about ES but, my opinion about how ANY student should be approached, spoken to, counseled and treated is the same.
My best in the further development of TCS / LHS, Tom
Thank you "Dismayed" & Teri for acknowledging what I think is the heart of the issue.
It really pains me that NOT ONE OF MAARI'S SUPPORTERS has yet to acknowledge on this blog or on LDResources (actually, I think there was one person who said her child had good experiences but that a friend's did not) that there are children who have suffered because of Maari.
Why? Don't you believe your fellow parents? Do you really think that that so many would waste their time on something as stupid as a witchhunt?
I know so many of you and I KNOW that you have witnessed the angst of other parents whose kids were mistreated because I talked about these things with you when my child was there.
I challenge those who have chosen to remain silent to go outside of their comfort zone and at the very least acknowledge that the experiences recounted by other parents shouldn't have happened.
Acknowledge that the TCS/LHS community has some serious problems in addition to the things that are wonderful. Be about the task of truly fixing it and not just covering things up.
I just hope, for your kids sake, that things remain good for those who won't acknowledge the problem and that it never happens to you or your child.
You said, "While I have heard parents complain and disagree with Maari, there is one unquestionable fact that everyone agrees on and respects: her passion, caring and unwavering commitment to our kids. Maari is not infallible, but to think of Maari as abusive to the kids is preposterous and out-of-character."
I have quite a different experience and opinion. Maari was abusive to my child. Every other educator, two psychologists as well as the authorities whom I have spoken to agree. She did things that no educator should EVER do.
That's what this discussion is about for parents who have experienced the other side of the coin.
Can you acknowledge that? Does this concern you? Does it concern you that a number of people have reported things that shouldn't have happened? What should be done?
Fellas!! I see you all love Maari and what she has done for your child. That's great and as it should be. We all want our children to have the best school experience possible. I'm happy for you and your children.
Hypothetical question #1 for you guys - If your child was treated well at TCS/LHS, is it okay if another child experienced abuse?
Hypothetical question #2 - Is it possible that the incidents that parents and staff have reported here and on LDResources are true?
I'm not trying to be facetious, ironic or condescending. I am hoping that if you answer these questions honestly that it will help you make the most ethical decisions about how to handle the debate that is taking place. Decisions that will be right for all of the children at the school - not just yours.
You don't have to answer here. Answer in your own heart and mind.
This board seems to have calmed down some. Meanwhile, to finish up old business, I have been calling the school for over a week. The line is always busy. I even had the operator check. Does anyone know what's up with that?
Funny - I really would like to be wrong and I hope and pray that someone will make me be wrong but I really did not think I would get a thoughtful response to last posts I made.
The group of people whom I addressed my remarks to were probably more interested in trying to do what they consider to be damage control than having an honest dialogue.
They swooped down on this blog to talk about how great things are at TCS/Legacy. They posted to refute the issues that have been brought up, not to discuss them.
Well...the meeting at TCS that included Board Members was held on 10/30/07. Apparently there were some former parents present, but maybe only those who had positive things to say. I received no notice or invitation from TCS and I know of no other concerned former parent who did. I was told that Board Members were not introduced, though they apparently were in the audience, and did not have any active role in the meeting. Maari was present, which was also probably intimidating to some. Too bad... a lost opportunity for truly open comments and a give and take dialogue. What will ultimately matter are the results of the investigations that will occur based on the allegations that are documented. It is not too late. If you experienced or know of a situation that relates please e-mail me ASAP. My e-mail address is Tomoto2@aol.com There is strength in numbers!! Tom
Tom on Oct 28, 2007 at 7:21 PM you posted the following comment to the LD Resources web site:
Hi All, The forum being held on Tuesday, October 30th at 6:00 PM is very important for all to attend who have concerns about the treatment of TCS / LHS students and the general administration of the scool. Nothing will change unless people have courage and speak up! The best, Tom
The simple fact is you knew about the meeting and choose not to attend it. The only rational conclusions that can be drawn from your failure to attend this meeting are that (1)it is you who is not interested in a dialogue and (2)you have a personal vendeta against Maari which you are seeking to play out on the internet. Your comments here are disingenuous.
To "Anonymous", You do not know how many times I may have tried to discuss issues and concerns over the years, nor do you know who I may have approached in the past. I know this. At this time I have posted (on this site as well as LDResources) areas that, in my opinion, need focus and attention. This is separate from the issue of submitting documentation for review by monitoring and oversight bodies. These will be shared with those with oversight responsibility, not with the general school body at a meeting. I feel quite OK with myself and how I am proceeding with this. You may not feel OK with me or with my decisions. That is your right. And a question.....why are YOU "anonymous"? Your beliefs leave no reason to not divulge who you are. Those parents who have concern and are fearful of retribution may need anonymity. Be well, Tom
I am a present parent of an elementary student at the Child School who has now been there 4 years. This letter is written in response to your 11/3/07 post.
I believe that I am atypical of the type of person who has been posting on websites concerning the Child School. I do not believe that Maari DeSousa is a miracle worker, nor do I believe that she is a demon. I am reasonably satisfied with my child's progress at the Child School, but I would have hoped for even more progress. I have not been as involved with the Child School as I should be and have not participated in steering committees, parent committees, etc.
I do not think that a person should be destroyed based on unsubstantiated charges, exaggeration and innuendo. I do not believe that the complaints that you have lodged really get at the truth of the matter.
While the school certainly needs to improve in certain areas, especially with regard to communication, the serious charges that you make do not appear consistent with what I have seen.
Because the abuse you describe is inconsistent with my experience and observation, I find it difficult to believe your charges which are extremely vague and conclusory.
Your e-mails lack specifics as to what abuse allegedly occurred with respect to your daughter. There is a big difference between behavior that can objectively be characterized as abusive and a parent who is dissatisfied and may even have legitimate constructive complaints.
I am trying to keep an open mind, but your complaints seem very subjective. The information that you have provided shows more anger than substance.
There are many reasons that a parent of a special needs child might be angry. It can be a difficult and frustrating experience. Lack of progress is especially frustrating. There may be a fear that a child's special needs is somehow the fault of the parent, either through inadequate parenting or genetics.
Unfortunately, you come across as an angry person who may be displacing frustration and anger by blaming schools, teachers and administrators for the fact that your daughter required a special needs education.
What is interesting is that your daughter appears to have done fairly well. Although, you now express disatisfaction with the Child School, it is very fair to say that your daughter (who was admitted to college), could have done much worse. Moreover, it is not clear what abuse you claim that she was subjected to. I would be curious to know what her first hand experience was at the Child School.
If there is any substance to charges of abuse, I would like to know about it through more specific detail as to exactly what you claim actually happened. So far you have not done this, and you therefore come across as an angry person who is trying to stir up a lot of trouble due to a personal grudge.
To an extent, you may have succeeded. You have certainly stirred things up. In addition, some good may come out of what you have done as it may have encouraged the school to address legitimate problems (which do not reach the level of abuse) even if your claims may be exaggerated or unfounded.
From the perspective of someone who considers himself neither a die-hard Maari supporter nor a Maari enemy, your failure to show up at last week's meeting is inexplicable.
There is no doubt that your actions single-handedly resulted in the scheduling of last week's meeting. The meeting simply would not have occurred if not for you. You clearly knew about the meeting, and even sent an e-mail on the LD blog stating how important it was for all interested persons to attend and state their views. Yet you chose not to show up and express your views.
The fact that you didn't show up has destroyed any credibility that you might otherwise have had, amongst people like myself who have not experienced or witnessed any "abuse" but who do not strongly allign themselves with either "side". We came to the meeting because of issues that you raised and instigated. We were willing to listen to what you had to say. But you didn't even bother to show up.
I can assure you that the majority of the people at the meeting were wondering "where is Tom Ott..." At least, one questioner specifically asked if you were there. Another person commented "where's the beef", to reflect that your non-attendance along with the fact that the overall attitude of those at the meeting was at odds with the harsh tenor of the web-complaints spearheaded by you.
Whatever excuse you want to give for not showing up, the fact is that your non-apperance makes you look like a big flake.
I was at the meeting, and there was no censorship and it is clear that you would have been allowed to attend the meeting and your comments would be addressed.
Most of the people who attended the meeting, were curious to hear what you had to say and to learn whether there was any substance behind your generalized allegations. To paraphrase another attendee at the meeting your non-attendance left the impression that there was "no beef" to your complaints.
There were some parents at the meeting with legitimate constructive complaints and one very sincere woman (and husband) who lodged more serious complaints. She was allowed to express her views and was respected. I believe that she had a very bad experience at the Child School with one of her children [her other child still attends the Child School].
From what she said, I believe that her situation was mishandled and that she may not have been given the proper respect [only her side of the story was presented, there was no rebuttal and she certainly was not attacked or even challenged]. I do not believe that what she described constitutes "abuse".
She and her husband claimed that they had sent a letter to the Board and that the Board never responsed. The Board claimed that they never received the letter. I do not know the truth. But, I personally witnessed LeAnne Bloome of the Child School privately approach the disgruntled parents after the meeting and ask them if they had a copy of their letter so that she could personally give it to the Board. When they informed her that they did not make or save a copy of their letter, LeAnne promised that if they could recreate their complaints in a new letter, she would see to it that the Board gets the letter.
There was an open forum at the meeting, but your views were not heard because you chose not to show up.
I remain anonymous, and find it hypocritical that you criticize only those who disagree with you for being anonymous. I really don't want you knowing who I am (I've never met you and I don't know you) as you seem like somewhat of a loose wire. I'm sure that I'm not the only person who feels this way.
In any event, I remain baffled that you chose not to attend the meeting. If you can shed any further light on this matter, I would be interested. If you continue to post on this website I would urge you to place any personal grudges aside and focus on specifics and concrete facts.
Former parents, like myself, like Tom Ott, were not "invited" to the meeting. The meeting was for parents of current students. Should we have stormed the castle, pilloring the director by candle-light, as has been referred to in a former post? Are you aware that former students have been turned away at the door -- indeed, the doors bolted and locked -- as they approached? Does anyone honestly believe that Tom Ott would have been "given the floor", if Maari was there? In our family's case, Maari was overly punitive and verbally insulted my son. However, my child's friend had his pants and shoes removed and hidden. Certainly one act is more "abusive" than another. And just because you don't believe it, or haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. Believe what you want. As I did. Until you find your child under a scrutiny and a disapproval that you never saw coming.
First, I wish those of you who wish to remain anonymous would create an anonymous title like I did to identify yourself because it is hard to follow this thread with everybody calling themselves anonymous.
Second, to the anonymous person who said "I am a present parent of an elementary student at the Child School who has now been there 4 years." If Tom were to divulge details of the abuse that children have experienced, don't you think that would be inappropriate?
I have given him information about what happened to my child and I certainly do not expect him to discuss it - even without mentioning names - with anyone at the school. To do so would put our privacy in jeopardy.
Why does Tom have to prove anything to you? The evidence is already on LDResources. There are enough hair raising things mentioned there that seem real to me especially since I have experience with the dark side of TCS/Legacy. I recognize some of the incidents mentioned and therefore know who posted them and KNOW that many of those posts are true.
Have a litle faith in the parents who have been willing to share their pain. Where there is smoke, there is usually fire.
I have presented a blog on LDS Resources and my opinion remains the same; either get rid of Maari, not the school because the SCHOOL IS NEEDED, and replace her with someone who can effectively do the job or have her supervised.
I do not know how many parents on this blog are minorities,black, hispanic, etc. or have minority children in the TCS/LHS, but my experience with my son regarding Maari was not a good one and other minority kids would complain of the same thing to me and my husband. She was very good in calling them out of their name and lowering their self-esteem. As I stated in my blog on LDS resources she knew who to pick on and who not to pick on.
Some of the horror stories my son related to us regarding his relationship with Maari, we did not find out until after he graduated from LHS because we are active in the community of RI and was a major part in helping the school get on the island. My husband and I knew there was problems with our son and Maari, but not to the extent of what he related to us.
To the minority parents out there or parents with minority children talk to your children and if you suspect anything have your children come to you and tell you so that you can take action.
We parents who are complaining are not ogers. We are trying to constructively turn a situation from bad back to good for our children.
To All TCS & LHS Parents, Administration & Staff: I am deeply troubled by the personal attacks and tone between parents. I believe that we all can agree that TCS / LHS is an important institution. It has over the years housed our students with disabilities when other notable schools would not. We are all pleased by the student / teacher ratio which our children have been fortunate to experienced. We are grateful for the cultural and racial diversity in the school. Depending on the student's disability, I believe that the majority of parents at TCS / LHS would not want their student to go back to public school where classroom sizes are much larger. For these reasons and more, TCS /LHS is an important institution which holds an immeasurable /valuable price tag.
Having said that, I do believe that TCS/LHS does have many areas of challenges and needed improvement. During the years that my son, Zachary attended, I became deeply concerned about the extremely high and unusual turnover of faculty. In fact, the loss of Sal Denise and several other highly respected staff members gave me pause to ask why is this happening?
I was deeply appalled by the selective international trips, which were billed as broadening a student's independence. These trips could only be taken by students from families with financial means. At no time did the school make accommodations for families who could not afford these extremely expensive trips. If this were a public school, these types of trips for a limited student population would never occur.
I was deeply concerned by the lack of rigorous academic standards, which was purported by the school leadership.
A number of students over the years have voiced to me their negative feelings about the director. At first, I thought it was just kids challenging authority. As time went on and students continued to shared their experiences, I grew concerned. Some would ask, why didn't I change schools? My response to this question is exactly what school choices do we have?
I was deeply concerned about the lack of financial and reporting controls which governed PA funds. If an audit by the state were conducted, there would be many red flags raised. This in turn could put the school in jeopardy.
Lastly, for those who may not know my background, I am the former 1st vice-president of Community School Board-District #2 in Manhattan. I served on the board for eight years and worked closely with various district superintendents and principals. I have had first-hand knowledge of well-run schools as well as schools which needed improvement. One of the core ingredients for a high achieving school is the educational leadership who can lead and inspire students, faculty, parents and other school employees. When I look back at our experience at TCS / LHS and compare it to other strong educational leaders in district #2, there is a significant gap which presents an important challenge to the TCS/LHS board of directors.
I want to end on a happier note. Our son is a freshman at SUNY-Morrisville and loving his college experience. For those parents who want to know more about college choices for their students, I would be happy to share our college selection process. Our son was accepted to 8 of the 9 colleges.
All the best to your student. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Respectfully, Doug Robinson Father of Zachary Robinson Class of 2007
I am a current (and brand new) parent, and very troubled by all the comments made on both message boards. If the trouble and abuse does exist in the school (I havent seen it personally), then have those who wish to make a difference reached out to the media at all? Surely there are enough PR contacts through the parent community to connect with the education editors? I would think in this day/age someone must have "captured" this abuse on a cell camera or otherwise. And why hasnt the teacher's union become involved, or has it? Curious as to what ACTION has been taken to help solve the problems discussed in this forum...
Unfortunately, I was informed today that my child's teacher, effectively today, will not longer be teaching at The Child School. This is the third teacher that my child loses in the middle of the semester in less than 2 and 1/2 years. What is really going on in this school?
To the Anonymous who's child lost a third teacher:
This is not an uncommon problem at TCS. You can try approaching other parents or faculty (maybe the guidance counselors?) to find out why. However, if you don't like the response or the answer, you may want to seriously weigh the pros and cons of your child remaining at the school.
With all due respect to Teri's response, I must disagree. I hope that parents hang in there and question why faculty members are leaving at an unusual pace.
The only way things will change is to have a grassroot of parents to say "enough is enough"!
Doug, I understand and respect what you are saying. However, with 20/20 hind site, and knowing what I know now, I wished I had taken my daughter out of TCS years ago. That's why, I suggested that Anonymous weigh the pros and cons.
You are right when you say there is a great deal of potential at TCS. However, for anyone to initiate a grass roots group, they need to know they are not alone. I'm sure, especially after everything that's been said on this blog and the LD site, that many of the parents talk to each other.
Teri, Understood! I think the great power of the blog is that parents can initiate discussion whether anonymous or not, here in cyberland. These are the 1st steps. Next, some parents have to take the lead and organize the effort and have a physical contact and etc.
Tom Ott was brave enough to start the effort. Now it is up to others given that his child, like mine have graduated.
Doug Robinson said: I hope that parents hang in there and question why faculty members are leaving at an unusual pace in response to Teri suggestion of considering the pros and cons of keeping your child at the school --
I did the latter. After considering the pros and cons, for three years, I pulled him out. As you said, Doug, there is a lack of academic rigor at TCS, and it was not easy for my child to make up those three years of watered down curriculum and the continuity lost due to sudden exits of teachers. Parents making a statement at the expense of their child's education? I wouldn't do it.
Posted by Leonard Straus, Jan 7, 2008 at 2:38 AM When my daughter Heather found her way into the Child School it was like someone dying in the desert finding an oasis.
Suffering from Severe Clinical Depression as well as LD, she had been grossly misserved by the NYC educational system for nine long years. She had been through placements in five different programs plus home instruction. Only one of those programs had come anywhere near meeting her needs and it did not continue past fifth grade.
Due to her emotional issues few private schools would even interview her. We had no financial means and most schools will not offer a seat if finances are not in place. The CSE was not acknowledging that she qualified for a Nickerson letter and we were looking for advocacy to help us fight for it.
Suddenly we got a call back from the Child School. A seat had opened mid-term & could they interview Heather? Maari was the only one to offer to place Heather. Her emotional issues, unusual combination of LD issues and financial issues made her personna non grata at all other schools we had spoken to, as the reality is fewer seats than children in need of them.
Miraculously I had someone new to deal with at the CSE the next day and left with Nickerson in hand.
Upon entering eigth grade at the CS Heather blossomed as never before both socially and academically. She made the first real freinds she ever had. She participated in the spring play (take my word for it - that was amazing). My wife and I noticed the autocratic ways the school was administered, but the kids all seemed happy and we saw Heather progress by leaps and bounds.
As Sanford Shapiro points out very astutely; Those IEP’s are an extention of a system that has failed these children. Is it more important to administer the IEP’s in a manner that can be documented as compliance, or is it more important to provide the child with the tools/environment that allows the child to achieve the goals those IEP’s were meant to foster?
Unfortunately, upon moving from MS to HS Heather came afoul of the dark side of the CS/LHS Administration style. Specifically, she is a high intelectually functioning student with severe processing disabilities. She is bored with work that is less than challenging to her considerable intelect, but she performs well below grade level in spelling, reading & some areas of math. She comprehends college level texts when they are read to her, but has difficulty decoding simple reading material on her own.
As a result her freinds whom all had the benefit of years of CS training in compensating for their LD’s went on to the Regents program, while she was tracked to the RCT program. I agreed at the meeting that she could benefit from more educational rehabilitation before being asked to bear the pressure of the pace of the regents program. I was wrong.
Heather was deeply wounded by being completely cut off from her peers, the first she had ever known. She was placed among a low functioning student body she had nothing in common with. She was a lone female in an all male environment. She complained at home and she attempted to meet with Maari to have this rectified only to be repeatedly rebuffed.
Having seen the “Cult of Maari” my wife and I tried coaching Heather to persist and get this resolved without our intervention. We felt it would build her confidence to succeed and avoid provoking a defensive and/or antagonistic reaction in the administration. Another big mistake on my part.
Heather was more emotionally derailled than we realized and she scratched herself while in school out of frustration. This behavior is called cutting. It can be dangerous when an emotionally troubled person really cuts themself. Thankfully, Heather never ever made real cuts, she would scratch herself as an outlet for her frustration. She was under the care of both a psychiatrist & a psychologist & had this behavior under control. It is a measure of just how upset she was that she reverted & made three small scratches on her arm (this behavior has not been repeated since). However, the school did not find it neccessary to speak to her therapists despite my requests and their attempts to contact the school.
At the time of the incident Heather’s guidance counselor, a neophyte and barely more than a child herself (the prior one having left suddenly) called my wife but couldn’t communicate calmly as she was hysterical over the incident. Naturally, Maari was called in and (according to my daughter) stated to Heather that now she could never transfer to the Island House (Regents program) where her freinds were because Maari could no longer trust her.
Now as an adult I can certainly see how Maari would have been frustrated herself in this situation. A student causing a disruption in her admittedly hectic schedule. Her guidance counselor who should have been able to handle this (not that Maari would accept not being called in) in need of as much care as the disturbed student.
Doubtless it was a comment made in the heat of the moment without thought that it would have consequences. Doubtless had Heather not been so affected by that comment it might have been forgotten and had no bearing on Heathers options for the future. However, and this is the important issue here, LD children have major self esteem issues and they take things quite literally and deadly serious.
Heathers school career ended right then on the spot. She spiralled ever deeper into depression. She did not return to school, she could not get out of bed. She could not even tell us the details for more than six months.
It was several months into the following school year before we knew enough about this incident to request a meeting with Maari. At this meeting it was denied that this took place, nevertheless if Heather wanted to return to school the only place offered to her was to return to the environment that had destroyed her because Maari “could not let students dictate what terms they would attend her school under”.
I ask…Is it reasonable that the director of a school for the emotionally disturbed & learning disabled child would err & drop thoughtless comments in the heat of the moment to said child. As an “expert” on the emotional fragility of these children would not better be expected from a professional? In light of her Dr.’s urgent attempts to communicate that this child needs to be placed back in class with the peer group that she had found emotional support from and work out the mechanics of accomodating her academically later, is it proper to refuse to speak to them?
Richard I implore you to take a look, verify that you have no prior posts from my email address or IP address. Contact me if you wish further verification, I will sign releases to let you verify with my daughters therapists what I have stated herein.
There is truly a dichotomy at the CS. It can be the best thing that ever happened to some of these children, or as in my daughters case, when Maari is rubbed the wrong way, it can crush them for life.
Yours truly, Leonard Straus
Posted by emily, Mar 8, 2008 at 3:43 PM hi, i just left the school last week in the middle of the year for great reasons and i want every one to know why and be informed how horrible this school is run….first of all, there are no certified teachers…..maari yells at them all, they all quit and there never replaced. we have a arcutecure as a math teacher, a knitting teacher for science and the superviser is our english teacher. last year we even had a writing teacher that didnt speak a word of english and a reading teacher that wrote in spanish and was the spanish teacher. secondly, maari vebally abused me as well as every other kid in this school….examples….
1. in the 8th grade my health was bad. i just got out of the hospital 4 days before the 8th grade prom which maari knew. i wasnt supposed to really go but i took that chance because i already bought my dress, had a date and was looking foward to it. during the prom, i got sick again and lost eye sight and got very dizzy to the point that i couldnt even stand up. i called my parents to come and get me and as im on the phone with them, maari comes and grabs the phone out of my hands. she told my parents not to come and hung up. then took my phone away and put it in her purse. i just started the school in the 8th grade so my parents thought to follow maaris orders and didnt come and get me. maari told me that im making it up to get attention…why would i want to go home on my prom night!…WHAT GIRL WOULD WANT TO LEAVE HER PROM EARLY!!!!!!!!. any way, this is what she belived. she told me to rest for 10 minutes and the rest of the prom she told me that she wants to see my standing up the entire time, clapping and smiling which i did because she thetened to suspened me if i didnt…she also made me dance with my date on the last dance which made it worse since i was dizzy and could barly see.
2. maari ascused me of writing I HATE ERIC on my teacher erics desk. i would never ever do something like that ever. she refused to have a hand writting test and refused to look at my notes to see that i was not writting with green marker that day. to punish me, she did not allow me to go on a class trip and made me stay in her office doing work the entire day!!!!!!!!!. she called my parents up for a meeting for something i didnt do!
3. she pulled me and my friends in the 9th grade out of class and screamed at us because we were fighting. she called us NON SPECIAL ED DIMWITZS. then, she told us that if she ever sees us talking to each other again then we can pack our bags and find our selfs another school. WERE TEENAGE FREINDS, WHERE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT!.
4. maari acused me of spreading a rumer. all i did was play a messege for my friend alex on my phone. the message was my other freind robert that was fighting with alex at the time who ask me in the messege to play it for alex on the bus. the message was him apologizing to alex. alex called robert back after hering that message and they made up. when i got to school, some how it came out that i did this. alex got mad at the kid david who told every one i did this and we all started fighting. the teacher send us to maari and she acused me of starting all these rumors since i send the messege on my phone. to punish us, she locked me and david and robert in a room with no lights on for two hours. then she said to us that we will never pass the rcts and will be left back for behavior issues.
5. on a program in our school for art, chourus and band called night of music, they had me helping set up every thing. the art teacher gave me an entire exibit of my art work on the night of music….i went back to the art room to get something and my co teacher was standing there making me leave. i was explaining to her how im helping the art teacher but then she told me that there taking art away from me. i started crying because i cant get into FIT collage with out art on my transcript. i was told to shut up, go back to my art teacher and not say a word. HOW DO THEY EXPECT ME TO GO ON STAGE IN LESS THAN AN HOUR AFTER BEING TOLD THAT MY FUTURE IS RUINED AND HOW CAN THEY EXPECT ME TO HELP MAKE ART WORK FOR THIS PROGRAM WHEN I KNOW THAT THRES NO MORE ART!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL!!!!. HOW DO YOU TAKE ART AWAY FROM YOUR BEST ART STUDENT. thats when my parents started looking into other schools.
6. 3 days after this incodent, i went to the art room just to drop off pix and the art teacher told me to stay for the rest of the period and do art one last time. she called my chorus teacher and gave me permission to stay the next class also (thats the class i was missing). also, i was submitting my art work into moma that week. as im drawing, marri comes in acusing me of cutting class and sends me to her office. SHE CALLED ME A MINIPULATIVE SPOLIED BRAT AND MY PARENTS A MINIPULITIVE BABIES! she also told me that i never heard the word no and thats why i have so many pets because my parents spoil me and thats why im cryingn because they said no art. THATS NOT TRUE….THE REASON WHY I HAVE SO MANY PETS IS BECAUSE IN THE 5TH GRADE I WAS BULLIED AND WAS ABOUT TO COMMIT SUISIDE SO I RESCUSED A LIZARD AND STARTED OPENING UP TO IT. WHEN MY PARENTS SAW THAT ANIMALS WERE SAVING ME, THEY BOUGHT ME ALOT OF THEM AND I STILL HAVE SOME OF THEM TODAY!!!!!!!!!. she left me alone for 10 minutes and i wrote a note to my self as a stradigy to calm my self down. the letter stated every thing that happened and how i got permission to stay in the art room and wasnt cutting class. then she took me to the other school to ask the teachers a question to see if they had something to do with want happened. i asked her if she wanted to read the letter i wrote my self and refused. then she screamed at me in the middle of the street saying that shes a very confident woman and will not take my bulling. people were staring at me like i was a criminal. then when she found out that i got permission from the teachers to go to art, she screamed at all of them. the teachers were mad at me because maari acused them of letting me stay there two periods. the teachers thought i lied and told maarii that. i told the teachers that she acused them and never read my letter and never let me tell my side of the story. there fore i didnt lie.
that was the last day i returned to school. i didnt sleep for 9 days straight and had emotional breakdowns in the middle of the night on my hallway floor and had a nervous break down from sleep deprived at the doctors office. my dad would never send me back to that school even if i didnt get excepted into another special school. luckly i did!
i think the whole world should no to never send there kid here….it is a prision chamber!!! this school did me more harm then good emotionally. plus theres no education. unfortiontly the teachers have to follow her rules and are forced to yell at the kids and shut the kids up for every little thing because if they dont, then maari will fire them. thank you for reading this, i hope this chages your mind about tcs
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51 comments:
glad to see this parents will be talking
glad to see this parents will be talking
ITS ABOUT TIME WE ALL STARTED THIS DIALOGUE
ITS ABOUT TIME WE ALL STARTED THIS DIALOGUE
Hi,
Just wanting to test out the easiness of leaving a comment and.......to thank the person who has put so much time into setting up this blog. As we know from LDResources.....it is a much needed source of communication!
Thanks,
Tom
I just found this blog on LD Resouces and I am so glad to have a forum that is dedicated to TCS/Legacy only.
My child's experience at TCS/Legacy was good and bad. The good part was the small size of the classes and the staff members who were professional and caring. The physical setting is lovely. There were several teachers who insisted on teaching real content in spite of Maari's attempts to stop them. They were courageous educators. Many of them are gone now.
The bad part was the lack of IEP mandated services, the unprofessional, brutal and damaging things that Maari said and did to my child and the staff members who fell in lockstep with Maari's abuses. My child's circle of friends spent a lot of time discussing the deficits of the academic program, Maari yelling at staff and students and feeling inadequate because of things Maari said and did to them.
I am hoping more people will come and post. Let's have an intelligent discussion about this - whatever your perspective is.
Oh and by the way, I did send a detailed account of what happened to my kid to Tom Ott. I suggest that any of you who have had problems with IEP mandates not being met or other problems, abuses etc. do the same. E-mail him at Tomoto2@aol.com. Tom has assured me that he will keep my info confidential and I trust him. I'm sure you can too.
Dear Tom and those on this e mail list: First of all Tom, I hope that you and your family are doing well. It has been a while since we last spoke. As you may know, I have remained active at TCS within the parents' association both on the steering committee as well as on the fundraising committee. At the time you resigned last year, as I am sure you will recall, I had reached out to you to meet with you and/or engage in some lengthy conversation(s) regarding your experiences and thoughts, both positive and negative, in order that incoming parents such as myself could appreciate those issues and move toward seeking improvements in any necessary areas. You advised me that at that juncture you were extremely involved in your daughter's transition from TCS and would not have time for any extended discussions although you directed me to the proposed by laws and some prior steering committee meeting minutes. It appears that now, however, you have plenty of spare time and again I offer you the opportunity to address any issues that you feel may benefit the students at TCS. Some of those receiving copies of this e mail may find it surprising that there is a current, involved parent willing to listen to issues and even if appropriate raise topics at future steering committee meetings if in fact constructive issues that will benefit our children can be addressed. After all Tom, we have always professed to have the children's best interests as our sole focal point and thus again I offer a platform for issue discussions. As an attorney, I value so deeply the process in which one can express one's views and criticisms in a professional and positive manner. Needless to say, I would not be taking the time to furnish these thoughts if I did not truly value that process and everyone's right to be heard especially if there can be a benefit to my child or any other child or person with or without special needs.
With that said, I would like to bring you up to date on what a wonderful year we have enjoyed at TCS. First of all, thanks to the arduous efforts of our predecessors such as you Tom, the steering committee has met and enjoyed a tremendously successful initial meeting. We actually had a 100% turnout. Every single issue we discussed was not only decided by consensus, if I remember a very important facet of your prior leadership, but with unanimity as well. It is just unbelievable how open, caring, and expressive the parents associated with the steering committee have been. The fact that we enjoyed such a great turnout is well reflective of how well this year's parents association can expect to function. We have accomplished so much, so quickly, it is truly difficult to comprehend. Again, without the trail blazers before us, positive results would be so much more difficult to achieve.
Apart from our turnout, we have worked very hard in advising all members of the parents association that they are not only welcomed, but are encouraged to attend the steering committee meetings. Maari was kind enough to provide me with a forum to discuss same at curriculum night which was again an unbelievable success. Not only was the gymnasium packed, but the parents association had the opportunity to present our general philosophy and goals for the upcoming year. Advanced notices of the steering committee meetings are now published well in advance and in different venues to encourage as much participation and parent input as possible. With Maari and the staff's support, this, in my opinion, led to what might have been the most successful first event in the history of the parents' association.
Tom, you may find this hard to believe, but the Oktoberfest celebration for the kids attracted over 40 parent volunteers. When Maari allowed us to address the parents as a group and seek volunteers for our various events, never in a million years, would I have expected such a response for an event held during business working hours. The TCS student population had a blast and even though we ran into a snag initially over the process of placing the initial orders for the event, the smiles on the kids' faces certainly made up for any inconveniences (incidentally, we have already added to the next steering committee's agenda a discussion on appropriation issues so that we will finally have a written policy and guideline as to future events in order to avoid any other snafus).
At curriculum night, we also learned of the wonderful changes that Maari and the staff have effectuated for the students. After the success the parents' association had with last year's phon a thon, as advertised, we were able to open the media lab. The state of the art equipment and the response of the students who have been introduced to the media lab is phenomenal. Maari would even like to initiate a TCS radio station. From the students I have talked to, there is a great deal of excitement regarding the development of the media lab. So many of the students love movies, believe that they can broadcast or direct, and have other strong interests in what the media lab can develop. Thus, I was able to announce at curriculum night that this year's phon a thon will again seek to raise funds to improve the media lab.
Tom, you timing is impeccable. With such a strong list of parents and supporters of TCS which this e mail can reach, I would like to divert for just a moment and address that forum. With a selfless plug, this year's phon a thon will be run the week of October 22nd. Consequently, anyone who wishes to help the parents association raise money for the school in a non controversial fashion (the only benefit will be to the children who can truly use a fully equipped media lab and benefit from other worthy projects), please feel free to hop on board. You can e mail me, and I will be happy to attach a form for any current parent whose child is willing to (or can be convinced) to participate.
By means of background, the phon a thon became an idea raised out of the parents association's fundraising committee. It was entirely devised by parents and presented to the staff and administration who welcomed the idea with open arms. This will be the third phon a thon. With the help of the specialists, teachers, administration and parents, it is the only event at TCS which truly intimately involves every branch of the TCS family. After all, who is going to say no to a child from TCS who makes the effort to solicit contributions for his/her benefit? The idea is for the parents to contact friends and family members by providing a list of names and phone numbers to a child's home room teacher. The child will then call those individuals on the list during a specific time during the week of October 22nd. These participants guarantee that every call will result in a positive response. There are no "cold" solicitations.
There has been a great deal of emphasis placed on advising parents that it is not the number of people a child will call or the amount of the contribution that will make a difference. Rather, we seek to include as many students as possible in order that they can share in the wonderful sense of accomplishment and giving that is so vital in our society. Thus, even if a child makes one call to one parent or guardian for $5, that child is treated with as much encouragement and support as any other child in the process.
Meanwhile, educationally and socially, all of the staff and specialists work at having students create a suitable script (writing), practice phone etiquette if necessary, involve the students with tallying the responses (math), work on articulation for the phone call, develop a strong sense of teamwork, etc. Tom, thank you so much for providing such an easy forum to reach out to right before the event. If anyone on this list does not have a student currently enrolled, but would like to participate, you can e mail me your name and phone number and I would be honored to have my son contact you Wednesday morning October 24th. The students who participate have a ball planning, calling and totaling the contributions. Anyone who would like to assist, is certainly welcome. Incidentally, we are well ahead of last year's pace in terms of participants and once again the school has been unbelievably cooperative in providing publicity and assistance for the phon a thon. It is such a wonderful experience when everyone works so well together for the benefit of the children.
Tom, there are so many other exciting changes and developments at TCS I would like to share with everyone. Unfortunately, I took testimony all day today and will be doing so all week. I had written up to about this point last evening when my home system crashed and thus I had to start again whenever I took a short break. However, your comments are certainly important enough for me to comment further upon with respect to at least some of the other developments.
At curriculum night all of the parents were exposed to the wonderful developments at TCS. I know I will be omitting several items, but from foreign language options including Spanish and Japanese to the purchasing of new maps and globes, to the highly successful art and music departments, to yoga and the school store, to the technology classes and advancements, and to even a course in travel training, our children continue to thrive with the opportunities to advance themselves in such a broad and diverse academic and nurturing way. The opportunity for these children to grow not just academically, which one can attain in any proper educational institution, but socially and emotionally, where so many of the students struggle or demonstrate deficits, is just wonderful.
Tom, since you left, the school decided to institute a parent survey to obtain even more input as to parents' concerns. The reaction to the input has been phenomenal. I believe you were intimately involved (if not I am having a senior moment and it was a concern of other prior steering committee members) with the issue of communication vis a vis parents/parents, parents/teachers, and administration/parents. The changes that have occurred would absolutely warm your heart and bring a huge smile to your face.
First of all, as you recall, Maari had instituted a program under which parents could call into teachers or specialists at a given time. This system was the focus of constructive criticism (there is such an avenue clearly available at TCS for those who take the time to follow proper avenues) amongst a large number of parents. I know that you may find this to be an even more amazing development, but Maari announced at curriculum night that she had taken those comments to heart and even though she expressed reservations over the suggestions, agreed to adopt an e mail communication system for parents and teachers to utilize. A parent can still call the school to discuss issues, but now will also have an e mail forum which so many parents had sought. Just as significantly, the protocol or policy statement associated with the e mail system has been entrusted to the parents by referring the issue to the steering committee. I and other members of the committee will encourage all parents to join in the discussion and we will, hopefully before the holidays, provide the school with a written policy. Thereafter, designated parents will meet with the staff and make any necessary changes to allow the implementation of the system to be applied fairly and judiciously in order to bring about the best possible result in increasing communications between parents and teachers.
Also, I hope that you have had the opportunity to review the new school website. Needless to say, we have picked up the torch with regard to communication issues and carried it a long way. Our parent directory is now complete and parents can communicate with other parents so much more easily than ever before. Also, Tom, another development in this arena was the appointment of class parents who turned out in high numbers to support that system as well. The class parents and coordinators are working wonderfully this year in improving communications and keeping parents abreast of classroom developments. Yet, this is only one year removed from facing serious problems of parent apathy and a lack of filling all the class parent positions.
The parent survey brought about yet another wonderful development. Parents, as you probably know, had concerns over the method utilized for specialist treatment. Although Maari had preferred an integrated system, many parents asked for a more traditional approach. You will very pleased to know that Tom that once again Maari agreed to accept parental input and opportunities for individual specialist sessions are once again afforded. In other words Tom, as has always been my experience at TCS, even if I disagreed with the approach or a decision as to my child, the staff and administration will always opt for the course of action that best suits the individual need of the child.
I also want to let everyone know who may no longer be affiliated with TCS about Maari's open hours. The program was commenced last academic school year to foster even more parental input by allowing regularly scheduled individual or group discussion sessions with Maari. The program was a stunning success although I wish more parents would have taken advantage of the opportunity to attend.
Maari allowed and in fact insisted on the parents setting the agenda and raising subjects for discussion that they wished to address. I only attended the middle school sessions last year, but the extraordinary efforts Maari undertook to bring parents into the decision making process despite her unbelievably busy schedule was so much appreciated by those who attended. As just one example of how that process brought about a significant change, I will share with you one idea which came to fruition from those sessions. As undoubtedly everyone receiving this message will realize, the issue of socialization is paramount to the concerns of almost every parent with a child at TCS. In light of the New York State stringent requirements regarding obtaining a regents diploma, parents were very concerned that after struggling to foster friendships, a non regents student might not have any interaction with a regents student who he/she had befriended. Again, and I know this will bring a great big smile to your face, Maari adopted the parents suggestion lock, stock and barrel and agreed to house all 9th and 10th grade students at Patterson and all 11th and 12th grade students at Island House. Once again, the openness and cooperation amongst the staff, administration and parents has never been greater and just look at the results of the new and improved relationships; simply amazing. More and most importantly, it is the kids who have and will benefit from this type of dialogue and approach which is all that really matters in the end. I might add parenthetically that from my personal suggestions, I am probably running at about a 40% acceptance rating with Maari which in all honesty would have led me toward a career with the New York Yankees if this correlated to my high school or post high school batting average, but I am very, very satisfied with these results as a mere parent who was thereby forced to forego a lucrative sports career and become a lawyer instead.
I know I can go on and on about all the wonderful developments at TCS and within the parents association already this year, but at some stage I would like to return to my law practice and spend some time with my son before he goes to bed. However, I certainly wanted to respond to your individual inquiries.
You mentioned change which as a student leader and remnant of the 60's will always be an issue close at heart. Needless to say, there have been wonderful changes at TCS this year, only some of which I have mentioned in this reply. Certainly, there is room for improvement and with more creative and positive input all of us who have some role at the school will always seek to provide a forum for new ideas and positive changes. Again, I offer you or any other concerned individual a forum to discuss issues and ideas and to the extent that the present steering committee or other forum may wish to pursue those constructive ideas and suggestions, quite frankly, I will seek out such a forum. After all, and although I only speak for myself and not for any other parent or committee member, I and all of my present colleagues only wish to provide the best for our children. Any idea from any source which can further that goal, when raised in a proper, ethical, and appropriate manner will always have my ear.
You also mentioned turnover. I am very happy to report, and I know that you will be just as delighted to learn, that the turnover issue from at least my perspective is not an existing issue this year. Again, speaking from only my area of knowledge, which would be the middle school, we lost one co teacher who is seeking to further his educational pursuits toward a higher degree on a full time basis. I also know that the science teacher left the middle school, but fortunately she is now once again teaching my son and she has been assigned to the high school. I find this to be a very fortunate change of circumstances as my son loves science and absolutely thrives with this innovative and extremely involved teacher. Again, perhaps there has been turnover issues that I am unaware of, but I have seen nothing out of the ordinary in my personal experiences at TCS and also believe that there is far less turnover than what my son experienced in a very high priced main stream private school or during the years he attended a main stream parochial school for that matter as well.
As to your astute summary of leadership abilities, I believe I have demonstrated, and trust me if I had the time I could add several more pages of examples, of a school director who has fostered a partnership of corroboration amongst parents, staff and administrators. In fact, Maari, who you may have unintentionally omitted from your message by name, but whom I assume was the subject of certain pejorative remarks, has instilled this vision amongst her staff. I cannot even put into words what a pleasure it was to work with Tina who was the head of the middle school while I was the middle school parent liaison last year. Tina's support and vision to bring the principles of Mel Levine and the school's vision to implement those standards in a creative, cutting edge manner has to be applauded by even the most circumspect parent. I am truly sorry Tom that your daughter graduated just at a time when the level of cooperation, "collaboration and constructive input and ideas" have permeated the TCS family with such wonderful results as set forth herein. Yet I know that you take pride in learning that so many of your wishes and hopes have come to life.
As to your request to "state specifics and identify yourself" I hope that I have met your requirements in this reply. Again, I can certainly offer many more examples of leadership at all levels and amongst all categories at TCS which have arisen and led "effectively via a strength-based, positive, honest and supportive approach." Again, you will be so happy to note that your wishes are alive and well with so many concrete examples as set forth herein and elsewhere (incidentally how great is the updated web site with issues of What Every Parent Needs to Know, upcoming events, etc.)
Finally, you listed four general areas from which you are "presently compiling and categorizing documentation." Firstly, I know of no instances of verbal, emotional, psychological intimidation or abuse of any student at TCS, but thanks for asking. As a lawyer and officer of the court, I would not hesitate for a second in reporting any such occurrence. On the other hand, the improvement in my son's self esteem and sense of worth, which I see in so many of his friends at TCS, has been nothing short of miraculous. To think that my son began taking the subway independently this summer without incident, has kept possession of and used his cell phone judiciously and appropriately, has managed to keep his metro card funded, etc., all at the age of 14, is so warmly appreciated, I cannot even begin to put into words what a wonderful success story I have been able to monitor in terms of self esteem. My son has always responded extremely well to positive reinforcement and so poorly to aversive discipline. I emphasized this fact with Maari in my school interview. After my son was rendered so ill from a devastating, insidious disease which he contracted, he needed a nurturing environment under which his sense of self worth and accomplishment could flourish. With my son, academics has never been an issue with the exception of math. However, issues of self-esteem are very close to me and I could not be more grateful for what TCS has done for my child. My son, my wife, and I are truly blessed by the caring, sensitive, and nurturing environment at TCS.
Secondly, I know of no instance of any abusive interactions with a parent, guardian or staff member. Thirdly, I know of no instances of non-compliance with any service mandate set forth in a student's IEP. Finally, although I truly would like to share so many other relevant examples you have sought in your closing remarks, the hour is late and my son awaits me. Tom, thank you again so much for the opportunity to address these issues and I hope to speak to you real soon about any constructive suggestions you might wish for me to address. Sincerely, Gary Rome
Thanks for your comment, Gary Rome, Attorney, as you pointed out numerous times in your post. Surely, you realize that the powers-that-be are smart enough not to "mess" with your child, or with you, for that matter. Your Child School experience is protected by your position and your loquaciousness. As for so many wonderful changes in so short a period of time...my guess is that because there is now an awareness of a growing group of angry parents on the trail, we will be seeing impeccable behavior and compliance for a while.
Best of luck on your idyllic TCS experience. Have you bothered to read the experiences of other Child School parents on the LD Resources site? Based on my personal experience, and the experience of many other posters, my guess is that in addition to being used, you are being snookered. There is a long history there of catering to the child with an "elite" parent. Beware. As they say...if something looks too good to be true...it probably is.
Dear Gary,
On what planet or in which dimension is your TCS? I'm sure my daughter would have had a much more positive experience if she went to TCS there.
With all your experiences and involvement you NEVER heard of parents and students who were dissatisfied with the school? Have you gone to the LD site and read the posts there? And we are suppose to take your extremely long, pollyanna post seriously?
I apologize for being so hostile but I couldn't believe what I was reading. With all my heart I hope your experience at TCS is as positive as you claim.
Teri
First, let me preface this message by writing that I was not requested by TCS to write this. Some people are under the misguided notion that if someone writes something positive about Maari or the school that we were requested to do so. I am writing this because I was on the recipient listing along with the other 190 people Tom sent an email to. Hmm…I thought that when we provided our personal information to the school, it was only suppose to be used for directly related school info.
My child was at TCS for quite a few years. However, voluntarily we placed him in another school. This wasn’t due to Maari or the school. We were not asked to leave. My son required additional help that the school could not provide. No school is perfect and instead of blaming the school or Maari, I accepted the fact that it had to do with my son’s issues. Maari helped him to make the transition by calling him into her office and talking to him about the change he was about to make because he did not want to leave The Child School.
Over the years, I always had my son involved with various therapies outside of the school. Under the law, a student is not to be removed from their class for too much time (i.e. being pull out for services) if it is going to interfere with their education. For children without special needs, it is like having a tutor after school. Just because a student is not doing well in a subject does not mean that it is the school’s fault. You wouldn’t remove your child from the school – you supplement it with what they require.
Many parents need to remind themselves that when they had no other placement, Maari accepted their child. This was not due to few openings at other schools but due to the fact that the other schools had rejected the student. She is willing to work with them. For students who were asked to find other placements, it was usually because TCS could not provide the help that the student required. If she kept the student at TCS, she would be doing not only the parents a disservice but more importantly, the student.
Many of the parents who have written something on this thread, their children are now in college. Wouldn’t you consider that a success story? There are many other parents like me who are (were) happy with the school. They are not bothering to write anything because their child is happy and making progress at the school. They are being taught by dedicated teachers and staff which is what a good school is all about.
Parents who no longer have their child at the school, it is time to move on and spend your energy where it should be – helping your child at the present time.
Gary,
I am quite happy for you and your son that the TCS experience has been so positive. As a previous parent noted in her post..you never know what the future can hold in regard to your interaction with Maari so beware. One of the consistent threads communicated to me by professionals in the field about Maari is that….all is OK until all is not OK. And, after having truly given her the benefit of my doubt over the years she (Maari) has convinced me that this is true.
A lengthy point-by-point response to your e-mail to me, which has now doubled as your posting on LDResources, is not my intention or desire. I know what I have contributed and what I tried to contribute to the school and Maari, parents and staff know that as well. TCS / LHS was the 4th school that I had been involved in on behalf of my daughter. Trying to do what I can to contribute and help in the schools she has attended has been a consistent thread for me. I was quite involved in the PTA of her pre-school, co-chaired the PTA in her public elementary school and also was on the PTA of the school she attended prior to TCS / LHS. The collaborative work with those principals, parents and school staff was not perfect and there was healthy disagreement at times, but everyone was willing and able to move forward together…..and….we did!
Maari has led me to my decision to do what I can on behalf of students, parents / families and staff. Nothing you or anyone else may say to defend her and/or denigrate me will convince me otherwise. I have seen too much and I have heard too much (from a wide variety of parents, staff and students). And, as you pointed out in your e-mail, I now have some time to be able to devote to it.
I wish you continued good luck with TCS and your son’s education there. Maybe he will be one of the lucky ones who receives the type of education he is entitled to and deserves. Maari will make sure that he receives all the mandated services he is supposed to receive based on his IEP, as well as insure that he will not be addressed in an abusive, condescending and ego-deflating manner. And….I know why she will insure that, as you sound like you represent her more than she represents herself.
Again, good luck.
Tom
I have read some of the recent comments and wish to address just a few issues. First and foremost, all of my personal activity is geared toward furthering the interests of those students at TCS. I have no agenda, nor do I care about the source of any constructive ideas as to additional programs or activities that the parents association can consider to benefit the children. As I mentioned to Tom Ott, you have a forum to provide creative suggestions and programs you may believe might be helpful. As this will probably be my last comment in this forum, if Tom is willing to summarize those ideas and e mail me at work, I would be happy to raise any or all of the concrete, positive suggestions for future consideration.
Secondly, as many may not realize, I raised no personal attacks as to Tom or anyone else for that matter. If anyone ever attended any High School PA meeting that Tom organized, one could never deny the tremendous effort he extended in finding relevant topics and speakers. I hate to speak for anyone else, but I cannot imagaine any parent who did not walk away with a wealth of helpful information from any of those meetings and although my time with Tom on the steering committee was too short, I enjoyed our exchanges even though we are certainly on as opposite a position as possible as to our evaluations of TCS.
Accordingly, if Tom is willing, I would be happy to read over any positive suggestions he or anyone reading this comment may have that would benefit the children. Experessing displeasure with attorneys (I have many great self deprecating lawyer jokes which I will save for another time), hoping that the phon a thon will end without another alternative to raise self esteem, phone skills, etc (again this was totally parent created), believing that all the wonderful changes were in response to the current waive of angry parents (these changes arose from hard work and planning which began no later than last year and often earlier), believing that I or others who try to bring about positive changes are snookered and brainwashed, asserting that because we are commencing our fifth year at TCS does not qualify me to comment (I absolutely admit I do not have all or even close to a majority of suggestions as to how we can institute additional changes to benefit the children), or believing that the empirical information I provided such as the new programs, parent attendance and participation, etc. is simply a total fabrication and never occurred, simply does not allow me to consider well founded, positive suggestions as to new programs or activities which can benefit the children. Consequently, from herein, I will defer to all others for comments, although if it helps someone to vent and issue personal attacks as to myself or viewpoints, please feel free; it is far less than what I face in my (I won’t mention by name) carreer. Tom, I hope that you or others take the opportunity to gather concrete suggestions which I and of course other involved parents can consider. I hope that irrespective of our opposite viewpoints, for the sake of the children, we can create a forum for a free expression of ideas for programs or events which will bring about even more beneficial change and advancement than we have accomplished so far. There is always room for improvement and if something positive and beneficial to the children can arise from the issues that have been raised herein, we will all be better served. Gary Rome
To everyone concerned:
My name is John Fisher. My son Thomas, diagnosed with PDD when he was 3, attended TCS/LHS beginning in kindergarten and continuing through 10th grade. Thanks in no small part to Maari and TCS/LHS, he now attends an academically rigorous college prep boarding school in Connecticut where he is doing very well academically and socially. He did not leave TCS/LHS because of any dissatisfaction with the school on his or his mother's or my part. He left because Maari's and the school's success with him enabled him to move ahead.
The reason I'm adding my voice to this dialog is because I'm disturbed, leery of hidden agendas I know nothing about, and, frankly, creeped out that it's taking place at all.
When Thomas's mother and I were looking for a school for Thomas, we visited several schools that are designed to serve the needs of kids with developmental and neurological problems like his. Each of these schools had a unique environment. Our mood while searching for the right school for Thomas could best be described as one of desperation because he wasn't speaking or showing signs of progressing towards speaking. We decided that TCS would be a wonderful place for him based almost entirely on talking to Maari. When we decided that TCS was the best place for Thomas, we had already gotten a sense of the school's philosophy and way of operating, as well as a sense of what kind of person and director Maari is, and we feel that the sense we received then has been more than validated over the years. We were thrilled that our son was accepted there. Certainly we have never regretted his attending TCS/LHS. In fact I shudder to think where Thomas would be without having had the benefit of the unique insights and caring, comprehensive nurture that Maari and the school afforded him. Maari took a chance on Thomas, even though he still wasn't speaking when he started TCS at 5. Thanks to her and the wonderful teachers and staff at the school working under her direction, during his time at TCS/LHS, Thomas learned to talk, to read and write, to study and communicate his ideas well enough to take Regents, aim for college and, currently, thrive in a demanding boarding school environment.
I have had considerable experience with schools that are organized around specific missions and needs. What I have seen, again and again, is that the best of them have been very much the product of their founder's and/or director's passionate vision. Certainly Maari is a person with a passionate vision - one of the best I have ever encountered. Does she follow exactly the same path that other heads of school may follow? Thank God the answer is no. But who among us didn't realize that upon first meeting her? It's not as if she makes any secret about the way she operates. What has always impressed me more than anything about her is that she gets our kids; she sees right into their minds and souls, and she responds to them in ways that almost always work. Is she perfect? I'm sure she'd be the first to tell you that she isn't. BUT, does she deserve our respect and admiration? In my book she always will.
I think that all of us responding to this issue share something with each other. There isn't one of us who hasn't struggled in ways that people who don't have our kids' particular set of issues and problems can only guess at. At times it's been so hard for me that I've become angry. Angry at who? God maybe. Angry that life for me and Thomas and the rest of our family couldn't be easier . . . more hopeful. Angry that it has to be the way it is. I suppose that I, not unlike many people I know, have even at times looked for a scapegoat - someone else I could blame and direct my anger at. Good people, I'm not a mind reader, but I'm telling you that I have to wonder if something like scapegoating isn't going on here. If so, it should stop. Certainly, none of us with an ounce of gratitude for what Maari and the school have afforded our kids would be wise to get caught up in someone else's personal issue.
I hope that all of us can find ways not to engage in innuendoes and, instead of giving in to negative impulses, think about positive ways we can support Maari and TCS/LHS.
John
I firmly believe that the move to Roosevelt Island overwhelmed Maari in a way that no one could have imagined. The doors were spread open, and a whole population of teen-agers were admitted with whom she had little experience. Her concern for the "youngsters", as she calls them, is uncontested. Her ability to deal with today's young adult teenagers is where I feel her training and her experience fail her.
And to refer to my 17-year-old as a "youngster"...and to deal with him as if he were a "youngster"...doesn't work. The elementary school experience, the middle school experience was fine. The high school -- now THAT is where a change should be made.
Firstly, I've always been able to and consistently have met privately with staff and educators, without the director, to discuss the progress of my child. I’ve had personal, phone and email dialogues with teachers and staff related to problems with my child. I’ve also met privately with the director. I have always been able to voice my concerns AND DEMANDS openly without fear of retribution or a hint, at least to me, of intimidation. I certainly don't agree with the original commentary. I have found my son’s treatment by the staff, educators and administrators to be exemplary. I feel he is in a safe, beneficial and nurturing environment. I have heard some dissatisfactions with and criticisms of the school, staff and director. I am not always entirely thrilled with the choices made by those at the school. Many criticisms are clearly understandable yet such are limited to the anecdotal and so far have not evidenced to me any endemic, institutional, negligent behavior on the part of Maari, the staff or teachers. To the contrary, overall commentary has been extremely positive even from those who are less "loquacious", powerful or "elite". I am saddened by the present vitriol and personal attacks and yet hope that from this muddied stew a fruitful repast might arise.
I do question how a blog on the one hand can be established with the credo: "It is meant to give a voice to all those who she intimated [sic] and refused to keep the welfare of the child as the priority." and yet claim that "It is not meant to unfairly "bash" the director." I am a voice with a valid knowledge based opinion who has NOT been intimidated and has not had a sense that there has been any refusal to keep my child's welfare as a priority. Am I still welcome? I sense an inconsistency and a definite agenda other than the welfare of the students of TCS/LHS. Perchance some axes to grind from some past perceived transgressions? I sense a campaign to hang Maari from the nearest yardarm or maybe a transfer to Guantanamo to counteract all the evils in the world.
I would prefer that both negative and laudatory critiques be welcomed for the purpose of elevating the school or at least for the purpose of positively affecting our children's education and the forum not be used to gather evidence for some "Frankenstein” anonymous mob by torchlight procession to pillory the school or its director.
To respond to some of the comments and e-mails I have received I wanted to post parts of my previous entries on the blog:
Post#31
Some might ask why I have not looked into other schools. To those people I would answer……..”You then do not know that there are too few educational resources for the number of children who require better special educational services than the NYC Dept. Of Education can offer. That is why this Director can continue as she has been doing for this many years
Given the size of the school at this time (250 or so students) it is clear that a “healthy” administration would foster the decision-making process of designated staff based on a clear philosophy and accountability structure.
Post#36
There is a very real, concrete and identifiable “thread” that connects the many negative comments. That “thread” is the Director, Maari de Souza. Maari was a pioneer in her time, 25 or so years ago when she started the school, and there is no doubt that she is a very bright and determined person.
There have been (and are) many talented professional and non-professional support staff in the school. At this point in time I firmly believe that the gifted staff who are there will not be there for long (turnover is an issue in any school but……at TCS/LHS I believe it is a much more significant issue) and that many of those who were there, left as a result of being treated in a disrespectful, degrading and condescending manner.
The Board of Directors has a real and significant responsibility to the present and future students and they do not appear to have intervened in any significant manner. “Exit Interviews” of departing staff are a standard in schools that are committed to quality service. The “Board” should be conducting them, at the very least interviewing staff that have remained at least 1 year. They should be confidential and held after letters of recommendation have been provided to the staff person, as fear of getting a good reference can impact on honest feedback.
The school needs to go on, especially given how few options exist for students with these types of learning challenges. But……Maari’s “style” and behavior are common enough knowledge at this point in time for there to be a clear recognition that someone else needs to take the helm.
Post#104
WE (present and former parents, present and former staff and students) are now rising up to communicate our concerns in the hope that the Board will do SOMETHING to change how the school is administered and, at the very least to reign in Maari and hold her accountable or ….. WE will need to go further….Time will tell.
Post#185
I think that most of the posts that have been critical are focused on Maari, not the quality of the teaching, clinical or support staff. Most concerns stated are in relation to staff retention and the appropriate utilization of clinical support staff. This is very important to be clear about.
(I agree with everyone who believes that TCS needs to go on and to move on. What we may disagree about is Maari continuing to lead the school.
I plan to provide the documentation that I accumulate to the proper oversight, regulatory and auditing bodies. THEY will determine their validity and decide whether to investigate further. THEY will make their assessment and recommendations based on this. I feel very clear in what I need to do and I respect the follow-up that will result. If these various allegations and incidents are deemed credible what will occur is a result of what Maari has or has not done, not what any one other person has or has not done. I will end with the following from a previous post.)
Post#195
Your individual experience (as well as those of some other families) may not be reflective of the whole. As I was told by those “in the know” (those professionals in the field of special education resources)…..everyhting is OK until it is not…..or….in other words….until you have a significant disagreement with Maari. Maybe you have been lucky and, for your child’s and your sake, I hope that your luck holds out until graduation.
Wishing you…the best!
Tom
My name is Annette Berkowitz, and my son is currently attending his 5th year at TCS, Upper Elementary. I am responding to Tom Ott' s email.
My son started TCS, diagnosed as ADHD, & PDD: a hyperactive, anxiety-ridden child, unable to learn in environments where he was bullied, unable to express or assert himself, and unable to have or maintain friendships. I remember very vividly the pangs of pain I felt when he came home from his old school, knowing in my heart that he was slipping more and more behind academically, and especially emotionally and socially. It was a tough, long road to find the right school for him. I am grateful, every single day, that he was accepted at TCS.
At TCS, my son has been flourishing in every way. From Day One, when he was afraid
to go into his classroom, and sat on a bench for a while outside Maari's office, his life changed. I remember our joy, the very first month at TCS when my son finally started to read. It's hard to describe, and painful to remember! Nor will I forget the first
year we sent him on the yearly 10-day Spring trip overseas when he was 8, his acute anxiety on the way to the airport, and then barely saying goodbye to me when he saw Maari's face at the airport!! In Maari, he found an educator and a mentor, someone he loves and relies on to guide him not only in his academic learning, but also in his life learning. At TCS, my son has found a supportive and nurturing environment where he has felt safe enough to learn, to make friends and to grow.
As to Maari, I have profound admiration for her. From my direct experience, and my contact with other parents at the school, it is a very well known fact that Maari is very hands-on, knows every single child inside and out, and is demanding of the staff because of her exacting standards for the same level of passion, caring and commitment to our kids. While I have heard parents complain and disagree with Maari, there is one unquestionable fact that everyone agrees on and respects: her passion, caring and unwavering commitment to our kids. Maari is not infallible, but to think of Maari as abusive to the kids is preposterous and out-of-character.
Thanks to Maari, and the amazing staff at TCS/LHS, the school has grown and expanded, and, it has become increasingly difficult to maintain the same level of
hands-on management than was possible earlier. I see that Maari is well aware of her limitations, and seems to struggle with the balance that she needs to set, in order to perpetuate the quality of TCS/LHS with the demands of growth and expansion of the school. No school is perfect, and this is an ongoing process of growth, that we, as parents need to nurture, help and assist, for our kids.
In my effort to give something back to the school for what its giving my son, this year, I have joined the Parent Association Steering Committee. There is a lot of trial and error, but the PA has gotten off to a fantastic start, as it hopes to become a viable vehicle through which an expanding parent body can navigate, be heard and respected, and support Maari and the staff, for the benefit of our kids. Gary Rome eloquently described in his email, all of the exciting changes going on at TCS/LHS. This is what
I am looking forward to hearing more of!
Fascinating!
Between the comments here and the e-mail flying in response to Tom's e-mail, I find this to be absolutely fascinating.
Having been at TCS/Legacy long enough to have seen a lot, I can't imagine that any parent who has been there for a year or more hasn't heard about or witnessed Maari's inappropriate & abusive behavior.
Most of us parents have been complicit with the abuses until now because:
1. We felt powerless to do anything about it, or
2. We were satisfied with what our child was receiving and chose not to speak up on behalf of the suffering of other children.
Until now those who tried to do something in a vacuum were only effective in removing their children from the school but not at stopping the abuses at the school.
I am glad to hear from parents who are happy with what their children have received from TCS/Legacy but frankly, some of the e-mails strike me as being disingenuous.
NO MATTER HOW GOOD IT WAS FOR YOUR CHILD HOW CAN YOU NOT ACKNOWLEDGE THE SUFFERING AND DAMAGE TO THE CHILDREN FOR WHOM IT WAS NOT SO GOOD? I'd like to hear from some of you about that. What should be done about that?
Are you going to go on record and say that the parents and staff members who spoke from their hearts on LDResources about the bad stuff that goes on at TCS/Legacy were lying?
Dammit people, wake up!!! This discussion is ABOUT KIDS first and foremost. IS IT OKAY IF YOUR KID WAS TREATED WELL AND MINE WAS ABUSED? If your answer is yes, then keep pontificating. IF YOUR ANSWER IS NO, THEN LET'S HAVE A SERIOUS DISCUSSION ABOUT WHAT CAN BE DONE TO STOP THE PATTERN OF ABUSE.
This seems to me to be a tempest in a tea pot. We as parents all know how concern for our children can color our perceptive. We worry. I toke my son to the Developmentalist today.
She told me she had several patients that go to the child school and how well they all prosper at TCS. Now this is not the first time a private doctor or therapist has said this to me.
From my own experience I can tell you that my children have grown and prospered at the Child School.
Is it the perfect place for Every child, every parent? Maybe not, but that is where as parents we have to make the tough calls. I have meet parents who removed their child because the school did not meet the needs of the child, and having said that I can also say they had nothing bad to say about the school. They felt there was something their child need that the school could not provide. Fair enough.
This issue seems to be more about tar and feathering than anything constructive.
Maari is the school director not Henry Kissinger. She does not always have the patients to hold and coddle the parents and staff. They are adults.She never seems to lack the understanding and time for the children. That my friends is the bottom line.
Quite frankly she can disagree with me, she can yell at me and call me all kinds of a fool if she so wanted to. The bottom line is that the children are happy. They are learning. Their development both socially and scholastically can not be questioned. If you truly disagree with that opinion then you have the right and the responsibility to find a constructive solution for yourself and your child.Work with the school, other parents and staff, add outside therapy, ect. Those are really your only choices short of finding a new school.
This witch hunt mentality does not does not seem to help if anything it is behaviour we would not condone in our children.
To be clear……When you are talking about allegations of abuse (verbal, psychological and emotional, primarily) the “action” then needs to be targeted specifically.
I can only speak for myself in saying that……I am not trying to “scapegoat” anyone…..it is a needed action to address allegations related to children, teens and staff.
Reporting these allegations (as well as other, less important issues related to educational rights) to the proper authorities will lead to an investigation and determination.
No more needs to be said to explain the reasons for moving ahead.
I am absolutely amazed at the anger in some of the postings. I for one really like Maari. My son just started his 2nd year at TCS and I am so happy with everything. My son even went on the spring trip last year and will be going again this year. I am amazed that he willingly spent the night away from me and the family. He prefers the familiar and can become very anxious. The fact that he went on an *over-nighter* tells me that he is comfortable with his *school family*. That's quite an accomplishment for him and says a lot about TCS.
I think TCS is amazing and have had only good experiences.
Patti
PS. On public forums, such as this, I do not use my last name in an attempt to protect my son's identity and to ensure his safety.
It maybe surprising to hear angry posts for a relative newcomer. To anyone who has been at the school for awhile its not so surprising. the anger grows out of frustration. It has been my experience that yes Ms. De Sousa will take on students with very involved issues. She does seem to thrive on the gratitude of anxious parents worn down by the school search.However if you don't have much to offer the school financially or if your child is not strong academically then her interest wanes ( sometimes quite quickly).
To Glad my kid is outta there. The questionable and yes abusive treatment seems to just fly over the heads of the Director's supporters. Our ability to recognize their positive experiences lends more credences to our concerns.Where the mocking,condesending remarks ( Frankenstein mob!) have to make you wonder. The theme seems to be to take anything thats thrown at you and your child and buy into the benevolent tyrant line. Otherwise surely some one out there would express concern if not solidarity.
I am very happy that so many parents feel that their children have had positive experiences in TCS. My daughter had positive experiences too; however, they were overshadowed by too many of the negatives.
I realize many feel that this is a witch hunt or blame game against Maari. Maari is not being blamed for every bad thing that has happened to our children at TCS. However, there is a consistent thread of issues that involves Maari and that is the problem. And, yes, negative experiences will happen at any school, under any system.
Personally, I feel that the city and/or state should change the way they do oversite of all the private schools that accept funds (taxpayers’ money) to fulfill the IEP’s of public school students. While private schools are autonomous, provided they fulfill state curricular requirements, I feel they must be answerable for the treatment of the IEP students who attend them and of their families. The directors/principals of these private schools, (listed as non-public at the VESID site), should have the same accountability to their city’s school system as the public ones, if they are going to accept public funds.
There is a site for public school parents, by public school parents, called www.insideschools.org. Take a look at it. I wish there was something similar for private schools parents. I suspect that many private school students and parents have bad experiences that are swepted under the rug because of peer pressure (both student and parental) and due to the autonomy of these schools.
Response to parents regarding my suggestions and recommendations:
I have already outlined numerous times what I see (and what many others see) as the “fallout” related to Maari so there is no need to repeat any of those.
My intent is to support TCS /LHS and its’ continuation as an option for students and parents.
I will assume that you (who are asking) are serious and I will suggest a few things that, in my opinion, should be priorities to focus on:
1. The Board and PA should, at the very least, work to establish an interim administrative accountability and oversight plan to be in effect during the period of investigation and fact-finding. As noone can predict when this will occur, it will occur and will require much attention on the part of Maari. In addition, noone can predict what the end result will be, so if a plan is in place, there is always the option of its’ continuation, whether on a temporary or more permanent basis.
2. Generally, no matter “who” administrates, TCS / LHS needs to be able to functionally address the needs of the students that it has accepted into the school. Specifically, from what I have seen, there needs to be much focus and development in a few realms:
a. MS and HS needs to be much more focused in their curriculum and training offerings as it relates to transition planning and to the post TCS/LHS life of the students. In my opinion (and, I am not an educator but do know the adult service options and systems for graduates) the curriculum should be geared for ALL students to attempt acquisition of a Regents or Regents Competency Diploma NOT an IEP Certificate. IEP Certificates can be issued for any student who cannot pass the Regents or RCT’s at any time up to the students 21st birthday school year.
b. enhanced academic opportunities and supports for those who are pursuing Regents and Regents Competency Diplomas. This seems to be a present focus but staff need to be treated with respect and given positive support if any of the new opportunities are to really take hold.
c. “true” transition-type supports and services for all students, based on their needs (Travel Training. Vocational Training / Internships / Externships) and REMEMBER….students with disabilities have a legal right to a free and appropriate education until age 21 so…….gearing the academic curriculum for Regents and RCT’s would not be wasting a student’s time even if they ultimately cannot achieve this. There should then be a period (18-21, maybe) when those students could have the focus be on vocational options, if the school feels that they can properly meet those needs.
Students who think they are graduating with an academic diploma and DO NOT should not have to face much more limited options when they have used up valuable time at TCS/LHS.
(P.S….Maari was quite upset with me when I first spoke to her about informing parents more clearly as to what an IEP Certificate meant. I was told it would only upset them. Well..what do YOU think is more upsetting to a parent? Some initial anxiety that leads to appropriate planning with knowledge and accurate information or finding out, almost after the fact, that valuable time and potential options for your child have been wasted?
Yes, I agree with you!…..and because of that we made that type of information sharing a major part of the HS PA Meeting) Parents AND students should know where they are headed and what the choices are. If a student does not have the ability to pass the Regents and RCT’s one option may be to attend a private school that is not governed by that NYS requirement. I know that this may be easier for financially well-off families but there are also scholarships available that those with limited incomes might be able to look into as well. There are also some very good vocational transition programs that are sponsored by the NYC DOE and students and parents could access those as well BUT NOT if it is too late, age-wise.
My experience of TCS / LHS has been MS and HS, as my daughter attended other schools prior, so I cannot comment about ES but, my opinion about how ANY student should be approached, spoken to, counseled and treated is the same.
My best in the further development of TCS / LHS,
Tom
Thank you "Dismayed" & Teri for acknowledging what I think is the heart of the issue.
It really pains me that NOT ONE OF MAARI'S SUPPORTERS has yet to acknowledge on this blog or on LDResources (actually, I think there was one person who said her child had good experiences but that a friend's did not) that there are children who have suffered because of Maari.
Why? Don't you believe your fellow parents? Do you really think that that so many would waste their time on something as stupid as a witchhunt?
I know so many of you and I KNOW that you have witnessed the angst of other parents whose kids were mistreated because I talked about these things with you when my child was there.
I challenge those who have chosen to remain silent to go outside of their comfort zone and at the very least acknowledge that the experiences recounted by other parents shouldn't have happened.
Acknowledge that the TCS/LHS community has some serious problems in addition to the things that are wonderful. Be about the task of truly fixing it and not just covering things up.
I just hope, for your kids sake, that things remain good for those who won't acknowledge the problem and that it never happens to you or your child.
Annette B.,
You said, "While I have heard parents complain and disagree with Maari, there is one unquestionable fact that everyone agrees on and respects: her passion, caring and unwavering commitment to our kids. Maari is not infallible, but to think of Maari as abusive to the kids is preposterous and out-of-character."
I have quite a different experience and opinion. Maari was abusive to my child. Every other educator, two psychologists as well as the authorities whom I have spoken to agree. She did things that no educator should EVER do.
That's what this discussion is about for parents who have experienced the other side of the coin.
Can you acknowledge that? Does this concern you? Does it concern you that a number of people have reported things that shouldn't have happened? What should be done?
Gary R., John F., Jim M.,
Fellas!! I see you all love Maari and what she has done for your child. That's great and as it should be. We all want our children to have the best school experience possible. I'm happy for you and your children.
Hypothetical question #1 for you guys - If your child was treated well at TCS/LHS, is it okay if another child experienced abuse?
Hypothetical question #2 - Is it possible that the incidents that parents and staff have reported here and on LDResources are true?
I'm not trying to be facetious, ironic or condescending. I am hoping that if you answer these questions honestly that it will help you make the most ethical decisions about how to handle the debate that is taking place. Decisions that will be right for all of the children at the school - not just yours.
You don't have to answer here. Answer in your own heart and mind.
This board seems to have calmed down some. Meanwhile, to finish up old business, I have been calling the school for over a week. The line is always busy. I even had the operator check. Does anyone know what's up with that?
The phones have been down quite a bit and the phone company has been at the school several times working on the phones.
Funny - I really would like to be wrong and I hope and pray that someone will make me be wrong but I really did not think I would get a thoughtful response to last posts I made.
The group of people whom I addressed my remarks to were probably more interested in trying to do what they consider to be damage control than having an honest dialogue.
They swooped down on this blog to talk about how great things are at TCS/Legacy. They posted to refute the issues that have been brought up, not to discuss them.
Well...the meeting at TCS that included Board Members was held on 10/30/07.
Apparently there were some former parents present, but maybe only those who had positive things to say. I received no notice or invitation from TCS and I know of no other concerned former parent who did.
I was told that Board Members were not introduced, though they apparently were in the audience, and did not have any active role in the meeting. Maari was present, which was also probably intimidating to some.
Too bad... a lost opportunity for truly open comments and a give and take dialogue.
What will ultimately matter are the results of the investigations that will occur based on the allegations that are documented.
It is not too late. If you experienced or know of a situation that relates please e-mail me ASAP.
My e-mail address is
Tomoto2@aol.com
There is strength in numbers!!
Tom
Tom on Oct 28, 2007 at 7:21 PM you posted the following comment to the LD Resources web site:
Hi All,
The forum being held on Tuesday, October 30th at 6:00 PM is very important for all to attend who have concerns about the treatment of TCS / LHS students and the general administration of the scool. Nothing will change unless people have courage and speak up!
The best,
Tom
The simple fact is you knew about the meeting and choose not to attend it. The only rational conclusions that can be drawn from your failure to attend this meeting are that (1)it is you who is not interested in a dialogue and (2)you have a personal vendeta against Maari which you are seeking to play out on the internet. Your comments here are disingenuous.
To "Anonymous",
You do not know how many times I may have tried to discuss issues and concerns over the years, nor do you know who I may have approached in the past. I know this.
At this time I have posted (on this site as well as LDResources) areas that, in my opinion, need focus and attention.
This is separate from the issue of submitting documentation for review by monitoring and oversight bodies. These will be shared with those with oversight responsibility, not with the general school body at a meeting.
I feel quite OK with myself and how I am proceeding with this. You may not feel OK with me or with my decisions. That is your right.
And a question.....why are YOU "anonymous"? Your beliefs leave no reason to not divulge who you are. Those parents who have concern and are fearful of retribution may need anonymity.
Be well,
Tom
Tom Ott-
I am a present parent of an elementary student at the Child School who has now been there 4 years. This letter is written in response to your 11/3/07 post.
I believe that I am atypical of the type of person who has been posting on websites concerning the Child School. I do not believe that Maari DeSousa is a miracle worker, nor do I believe that she is a demon. I am reasonably satisfied with my child's progress at the Child School, but I would have hoped for even more progress. I have not been as involved with the Child School as I should be and have not participated in steering committees, parent committees, etc.
I do not think that a person should be destroyed based on unsubstantiated charges, exaggeration and innuendo. I do not believe that the complaints that you have lodged really get at the truth of the matter.
While the school certainly needs to improve in certain areas, especially with regard to communication, the serious charges that you make do not appear consistent with what I have seen.
Because the abuse you describe is inconsistent with my experience and observation, I find it difficult to believe your charges which are extremely vague and conclusory.
Your e-mails lack specifics as to what abuse allegedly occurred with respect to your daughter. There is a big difference between behavior that can objectively be characterized as abusive and a parent who is dissatisfied and may even have legitimate constructive complaints.
I am trying to keep an open mind, but your complaints seem very subjective. The information that you have provided shows more anger than substance.
There are many reasons that a parent of a special needs child might be angry. It can be a difficult and frustrating experience. Lack of progress is especially frustrating. There may be a fear that a child's special needs is somehow the fault of the parent, either through inadequate parenting or genetics.
Unfortunately, you come across as an angry person who may be displacing frustration and anger by blaming schools, teachers and administrators for the fact that your daughter required a special needs education.
What is interesting is that your daughter appears to have done fairly well. Although, you now express disatisfaction with the Child School, it is very fair to say that your daughter (who was admitted to college), could have done much worse. Moreover, it is not clear what abuse you claim that she was subjected to. I would be curious to know what her first hand experience was at the Child School.
If there is any substance to charges of abuse, I would like to know about it through more specific detail as to exactly what you claim actually happened. So far you have not done this, and you therefore come across as an angry person who is trying to stir up a lot of trouble due to a personal grudge.
To an extent, you may have succeeded. You have certainly stirred things up. In addition, some good may come out of what you have done as it may have encouraged the school to address legitimate problems (which do not reach the level of abuse) even if your claims may be exaggerated or unfounded.
From the perspective of someone who considers himself neither a die-hard Maari supporter nor a Maari enemy, your failure to show up at last week's meeting is inexplicable.
There is no doubt that your actions single-handedly resulted in the scheduling of last week's meeting. The meeting simply would not have occurred if not for you. You clearly knew about the meeting, and even sent an e-mail on the LD blog stating how important it was for all interested persons to attend and state their views. Yet you chose not to show up and express your views.
The fact that you didn't show up has destroyed any credibility that you might otherwise have had, amongst people like myself who have not experienced or witnessed any "abuse" but who do not strongly allign themselves with either "side". We came to the meeting because of issues that you raised and instigated. We were willing to listen to what you had to say. But you didn't even bother to show up.
I can assure you that the majority of the people at the meeting were wondering "where is Tom Ott..." At least, one questioner specifically asked if you were there. Another person commented "where's the beef", to reflect that your non-attendance along with the fact that the overall attitude of those at the meeting was at odds with the harsh tenor of the web-complaints spearheaded by you.
Whatever excuse you want to give for not showing up, the fact is that your non-apperance makes you look like a big flake.
I was at the meeting, and there was no censorship and it is clear that you would have been allowed to attend the meeting and your comments would be addressed.
Most of the people who attended the meeting, were curious to hear what you had to say and to learn whether there was any substance behind your generalized allegations. To paraphrase another attendee at the meeting your non-attendance left the impression that there was "no beef" to your complaints.
There were some parents at the meeting with legitimate constructive complaints and one very sincere woman (and husband) who lodged more serious complaints. She was allowed to express her views and was respected. I believe that she had a very bad experience at the Child School with one of her children [her other child still attends the Child School].
From what she said, I believe that her situation was mishandled and that she may not have been given the proper respect [only her side of the story was presented, there was no rebuttal and she certainly was not attacked or even challenged]. I do not believe that what she described constitutes "abuse".
She and her husband claimed that they had sent a letter to the Board and that the Board never responsed. The Board claimed that they never received the letter. I do not know the truth. But, I personally witnessed LeAnne Bloome of the Child School privately approach the disgruntled parents after the meeting and ask them if they had a copy of their letter so that she could personally give it to the Board. When they informed her that they did not make or save a copy of their letter, LeAnne promised that if they could recreate their complaints in a new letter, she would see to it that the Board gets the letter.
There was an open forum at the meeting, but your views were not heard because you chose not to show up.
I remain anonymous, and find it hypocritical that you criticize only those who disagree with you for being anonymous. I really don't want you knowing who I am (I've never met you and I don't know you) as you seem like somewhat of a loose wire. I'm sure that I'm not the only person who feels this way.
In any event, I remain baffled that you chose not to attend the meeting. If you can shed any further light on this matter, I would be interested. If you continue to post on this website I would urge you to place any personal grudges aside and focus on specifics and concrete facts.
Former parents, like myself, like Tom Ott, were not "invited" to the meeting. The meeting was for parents of current students. Should we have stormed the castle, pilloring the director by candle-light, as has been referred to in a former post? Are you aware that former students have been turned away at the door -- indeed, the doors bolted and locked -- as they approached? Does anyone honestly believe that Tom Ott would have been "given the floor", if Maari was there? In our family's case, Maari was overly punitive and verbally insulted my son. However, my child's friend had his pants and shoes removed and hidden. Certainly one act is more "abusive" than another. And just because you don't believe it, or haven't experienced it, doesn't mean it didn't happen. Believe what you want. As I did. Until you find your child under a scrutiny and a disapproval that you never saw coming.
First, I wish those of you who wish to remain anonymous would create an anonymous title like I did to identify yourself because it is hard to follow this thread with everybody calling themselves anonymous.
Second, to the anonymous person who said "I am a present parent of an elementary student at the Child School who has now been there 4 years." If Tom were to divulge details of the abuse that children have experienced, don't you think that would be inappropriate?
I have given him information about what happened to my child and I certainly do not expect him to discuss it - even without mentioning names - with anyone at the school. To do so would put our privacy in jeopardy.
Why does Tom have to prove anything to you? The evidence is already on LDResources. There are enough hair raising things mentioned there that seem real to me especially since I have experience with the dark side of TCS/Legacy. I recognize some of the incidents mentioned and therefore know who posted them and KNOW that many of those posts are true.
Have a litle faith in the parents who have been willing to share their pain. Where there is smoke, there is usually fire.
I have presented a blog on LDS Resources and my opinion remains the same; either get rid of Maari, not the school because the SCHOOL IS NEEDED, and replace her with someone who can effectively do the job or have her supervised.
I do not know how many parents on this blog are minorities,black, hispanic, etc. or have minority children in the TCS/LHS, but my experience with my son regarding Maari was not a good one and other minority kids would complain of the same thing to me and my husband. She was very good in calling them out of their name and lowering their self-esteem. As I stated in my blog on LDS resources she knew who to pick on and who not to pick on.
Some of the horror stories my son related to us regarding his relationship with Maari, we did not find out until after he graduated from LHS because we are active in the community of RI and was a major part in helping the school get on the island. My husband and I knew there was problems with our son and Maari, but not to the extent of what he related to us.
To the minority parents out there or parents with minority children talk to your children and if you suspect anything have your children come to you and tell you so that you can take action.
We parents who are complaining are not ogers. We are trying to constructively turn a situation from bad back to good for our children.
To All TCS & LHS Parents, Administration & Staff:
I am deeply troubled by the personal attacks and tone between parents. I believe that we all can agree that TCS / LHS is an important institution. It has over the years housed our students with disabilities when other notable schools would not. We are all pleased by the student / teacher ratio which our children have been fortunate to experienced. We are grateful for the cultural and racial diversity in the school. Depending on the student's disability, I believe that the majority of parents at TCS / LHS would not want their student to go back to public school where classroom sizes are much larger. For these reasons and more, TCS /LHS is an important institution which holds an immeasurable /valuable price tag.
Having said that, I do believe that TCS/LHS does have many areas of challenges and needed improvement. During the years that my son, Zachary attended, I became deeply concerned about the extremely high and unusual turnover of faculty. In fact, the loss of Sal Denise and several other highly respected staff members gave me pause to ask why is this happening?
I was deeply appalled by the selective international trips, which were billed as broadening a student's independence. These trips could only be taken by students from families with financial means. At no time did the school make accommodations for families who could not afford these extremely expensive trips. If this were a public school, these types of trips for a limited student population would never occur.
I was deeply concerned by the lack of rigorous academic standards, which was purported by the school leadership.
A number of students over the years have voiced to me their negative feelings about the director. At first, I thought it was just kids challenging authority. As time went on and students continued to shared their experiences, I grew concerned. Some would ask, why didn't I change schools? My response to this question is exactly what school choices do we have?
I was deeply concerned about the lack of financial and reporting controls which governed PA funds. If an audit by the state were conducted, there would be many red flags raised. This in turn could put the school in jeopardy.
Lastly, for those who may not know my background, I am the former 1st vice-president of Community School Board-District #2 in Manhattan. I served on the board for eight years and worked closely with various district superintendents and principals. I have had first-hand knowledge of well-run schools as well as schools which needed improvement. One of the core ingredients for a high achieving school is the educational leadership who can lead and inspire students, faculty, parents and other school employees. When I look back at our experience at TCS / LHS and compare it to other strong educational leaders in district #2, there is a significant gap which presents an important challenge to the TCS/LHS board of directors.
I want to end on a happier note. Our son is a freshman at SUNY-Morrisville and loving his college experience. For those parents who want to know more about college choices for their students, I would be happy to share our college selection process. Our son was accepted to 8 of the 9 colleges.
All the best to your student. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Respectfully,
Doug Robinson
Father of Zachary Robinson
Class of 2007
I am a current (and brand new) parent, and very troubled by all the comments made on both message boards. If the trouble and abuse does exist in the school (I havent seen it personally), then have those who wish to make a difference reached out to the media at all? Surely there are enough PR contacts through the parent community to connect with the education editors? I would think in this day/age someone must have "captured" this abuse on a cell camera or otherwise.
And why hasnt the teacher's union become involved, or has it?
Curious as to what ACTION has been taken to help solve the problems discussed in this forum...
Unfortunately, I was informed today that my child's teacher, effectively today, will not longer be teaching at The Child School. This is the third teacher that my child loses in the middle of the semester in less than 2 and 1/2 years. What is really going on in this school?
I totally agree but the dialogue should be about bringing in new leadership and building new trust among faculty, staff, parents and students!
Change can be a very good thing!
To the Anonymous who's child lost a third teacher:
This is not an uncommon problem at TCS. You can try approaching other parents or faculty (maybe the guidance counselors?) to find out why. However, if you don't like the response or the answer, you may want to seriously weigh the pros and cons of your child remaining at the school.
Teri
With all due respect to Teri's response, I must disagree. I hope that parents hang in there and question why faculty members are leaving at an unusual pace.
The only way things will change is to have a grassroot of parents to say "enough is enough"!
TCS has so much potential!!!!
doug
Doug, I understand and respect what you are saying. However, with 20/20 hind site, and knowing what I know now, I wished I had taken my daughter out of TCS years ago. That's why, I suggested that Anonymous weigh the pros and cons.
You are right when you say there is a great deal of potential at TCS. However, for anyone to initiate a grass roots group, they need to know they are not alone. I'm sure, especially after everything that's been said on this blog and the LD site, that many of the parents talk to each other.
How can they get started?
Teri
Teri,
Understood! I think the great power of the blog is that parents can initiate discussion whether anonymous or not, here in cyberland. These are the 1st steps. Next, some parents have to take the lead and organize the effort and have a physical contact and etc.
Tom Ott was brave enough to start the effort. Now it is up to others given that his child, like mine have graduated.
Doug Robinson said: I hope that parents hang in there and question why faculty members are leaving at an unusual pace in response to Teri suggestion of considering the pros and cons of keeping your child at the school --
I did the latter. After considering the pros and cons, for three years, I pulled him out. As you said, Doug, there is a lack of academic rigor at TCS, and it was not easy for my child to make up those three years of watered down curriculum and the continuity lost due to sudden exits of teachers. Parents making a statement at the expense of their child's education? I wouldn't do it.
2 recent postings from LDResources web-site.
Posted by Leonard Straus, Jan 7, 2008 at 2:38 AM
When my daughter Heather found her way into the Child School it was like someone dying in the desert finding an oasis.
Suffering from Severe Clinical Depression as well as LD, she had been grossly misserved by the NYC educational system for nine long years. She had been through placements in five different programs plus home instruction. Only one of those programs had come anywhere near meeting her needs and it did not continue past fifth grade.
Due to her emotional issues few private schools would even interview her. We had no financial means and most schools will not offer a seat if finances are not in place. The CSE was not acknowledging that she qualified for a Nickerson letter and we were looking for advocacy to help us fight for it.
Suddenly we got a call back from the Child School. A seat had opened mid-term & could they interview Heather? Maari was the only one to offer to place Heather. Her emotional issues, unusual combination of LD issues and financial issues made her personna non grata at all other schools we had spoken to, as the reality is fewer seats than children in need of them.
Miraculously I had someone new to deal with at the CSE the next day and left with Nickerson in hand.
Upon entering eigth grade at the CS Heather blossomed as never before both socially and academically. She made the first real freinds she ever had. She participated in the spring play (take my word for it - that was amazing). My wife and I noticed the autocratic ways the school was administered, but the kids all seemed happy and we saw Heather progress by leaps and bounds.
As Sanford Shapiro points out very astutely; Those IEP’s are an extention of a system that has failed these children. Is it more important to administer the IEP’s in a manner that can be documented as compliance, or is it more important to provide the child with the tools/environment that allows the child to achieve the goals those IEP’s were meant to foster?
Unfortunately, upon moving from MS to HS Heather came afoul of the dark side of the CS/LHS Administration style. Specifically, she is a high intelectually functioning student with severe processing disabilities. She is bored with work that is less than challenging to her considerable intelect, but she performs well below grade level in spelling, reading & some areas of math. She comprehends college level texts when they are read to her, but has difficulty decoding simple reading material on her own.
As a result her freinds whom all had the benefit of years of CS training in compensating for their LD’s went on to the Regents program, while she was tracked to the RCT program. I agreed at the meeting that she could benefit from more educational rehabilitation before being asked to bear the pressure of the pace of the regents program. I was wrong.
Heather was deeply wounded by being completely cut off from her peers, the first she had ever known. She was placed among a low functioning student body she had nothing in common with. She was a lone female in an all male environment. She complained at home and she attempted to meet with Maari to have this rectified only to be repeatedly rebuffed.
Having seen the “Cult of Maari” my wife and I tried coaching Heather to persist and get this resolved without our intervention. We felt it would build her confidence to succeed and avoid provoking a defensive and/or antagonistic reaction in the administration. Another big mistake on my part.
Heather was more emotionally derailled than we realized and she scratched herself while in school out of frustration. This behavior is called cutting. It can be dangerous when an emotionally troubled person really cuts themself. Thankfully, Heather never ever made real cuts, she would scratch herself as an outlet for her frustration. She was under the care of both a psychiatrist & a psychologist & had this behavior under control. It is a measure of just how upset she was that she reverted & made three small scratches on her arm (this behavior has not been repeated since). However, the school did not find it neccessary to speak to her therapists despite my requests and their attempts to contact the school.
At the time of the incident Heather’s guidance counselor, a neophyte and barely more than a child herself (the prior one having left suddenly) called my wife but couldn’t communicate calmly as she was hysterical over the incident. Naturally, Maari was called in and (according to my daughter) stated to Heather that now she could never transfer to the Island House (Regents program) where her freinds were because Maari could no longer trust her.
Now as an adult I can certainly see how Maari would have been frustrated herself in this situation. A student causing a disruption in her admittedly hectic schedule. Her guidance counselor who should have been able to handle this (not that Maari would accept not being called in) in need of as much care as the disturbed student.
Doubtless it was a comment made in the heat of the moment without thought that it would have consequences. Doubtless had Heather not been so affected by that comment it might have been forgotten and had no bearing on Heathers options for the future. However, and this is the important issue here, LD children have major self esteem issues and they take things quite literally and deadly serious.
Heathers school career ended right then on the spot. She spiralled ever deeper into depression. She did not return to school, she could not get out of bed. She could not even tell us the details for more than six months.
It was several months into the following school year before we knew enough about this incident to request a meeting with Maari. At this meeting it was denied that this took place, nevertheless if Heather wanted to return to school the only place offered to her was to return to the environment that had destroyed her because Maari “could not let students dictate what terms they would attend her school under”.
I ask…Is it reasonable that the director of a school for the emotionally disturbed & learning disabled child would err & drop thoughtless comments in the heat of the moment to said child. As an “expert” on the emotional fragility of these children would not better be expected from a professional? In light of her Dr.’s urgent attempts to communicate that this child needs to be placed back in class with the peer group that she had found emotional support from and work out the mechanics of accomodating her academically later, is it proper to refuse to speak to them?
Richard I implore you to take a look, verify that you have no prior posts from my email address or IP address. Contact me if you wish further verification, I will sign releases to let you verify with my daughters therapists what I have stated herein.
There is truly a dichotomy at the CS. It can be the best thing that ever happened to some of these children, or as in my daughters case, when Maari is rubbed the wrong way, it can crush them for life.
Yours truly, Leonard Straus
Posted by emily, Mar 8, 2008 at 3:43 PM
hi,
i just left the school last week in the middle of the year for great reasons and i want every one to know why and be informed how horrible this school is run….first of all, there are no certified teachers…..maari yells at them all, they all quit and there never replaced. we have a arcutecure as a math teacher, a knitting teacher for science and the superviser is our english teacher. last year we even had a writing teacher that didnt speak a word of english and a reading teacher that wrote in spanish and was the spanish teacher. secondly, maari vebally abused me as well as every other kid in this school….examples….
1. in the 8th grade my health was bad. i just got out of the hospital 4 days before the 8th grade prom which maari knew. i wasnt supposed to really go but i took that chance because i already bought my dress, had a date and was looking foward to it. during the prom, i got sick again and lost eye sight and got very dizzy to the point that i couldnt even stand up. i called my parents to come and get me and as im on the phone with them, maari comes and grabs the phone out of my hands. she told my parents not to come and hung up. then took my phone away and put it in her purse. i just started the school in the 8th grade so my parents thought to follow maaris orders and didnt come and get me. maari told me that im making it up to get attention…why would i want to go home on my prom night!…WHAT GIRL WOULD WANT TO LEAVE HER PROM EARLY!!!!!!!!. any way, this is what she belived. she told me to rest for 10 minutes and the rest of the prom she told me that she wants to see my standing up the entire time, clapping and smiling which i did because she thetened to suspened me if i didnt…she also made me dance with my date on the last dance which made it worse since i was dizzy and could barly see.
2. maari ascused me of writing I HATE ERIC on my teacher erics desk. i would never ever do something like that ever. she refused to have a hand writting test and refused to look at my notes to see that i was not writting with green marker that day. to punish me, she did not allow me to go on a class trip and made me stay in her office doing work the entire day!!!!!!!!!. she called my parents up for a meeting for something i didnt do!
3. she pulled me and my friends in the 9th grade out of class and screamed at us because we were fighting. she called us NON SPECIAL ED DIMWITZS. then, she told us that if she ever sees us talking to each other again then we can pack our bags and find our selfs another school. WERE TEENAGE FREINDS, WHERE SUPPOSED TO FIGHT!.
4. maari acused me of spreading a rumer. all i did was play a messege for my friend alex on my phone. the message was my other freind robert that was fighting with alex at the time who ask me in the messege to play it for alex on the bus. the message was him apologizing to alex. alex called robert back after hering that message and they made up. when i got to school, some how it came out that i did this. alex got mad at the kid david who told every one i did this and we all started fighting. the teacher send us to maari and she acused me of starting all these rumors since i send the messege on my phone. to punish us, she locked me and david and robert in a room with no lights on for two hours. then she said to us that we will never pass the rcts and will be left back for behavior issues.
5. on a program in our school for art, chourus and band called night of music, they had me helping set up every thing. the art teacher gave me an entire exibit of my art work on the night of music….i went back to the art room to get something and my co teacher was standing there making me leave. i was explaining to her how im helping the art teacher but then she told me that there taking art away from me. i started crying because i cant get into
FIT collage with out art on my transcript. i was told to shut up, go back to my art teacher and not say a word. HOW DO THEY EXPECT ME TO GO ON STAGE IN LESS THAN AN HOUR AFTER BEING TOLD THAT MY FUTURE IS RUINED AND HOW CAN THEY EXPECT ME TO HELP MAKE ART WORK FOR THIS PROGRAM WHEN I KNOW THAT THRES NO MORE ART!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL!!!!. HOW DO YOU TAKE ART AWAY FROM YOUR BEST ART STUDENT.
thats when my parents started looking into other schools.
6. 3 days after this incodent, i went to the art room just to drop off pix and the art teacher told me to stay for the rest of the period and do art one last time. she called my chorus teacher and gave me permission to stay the next class also (thats the class i was missing). also, i was submitting my art work into moma that week. as im drawing, marri comes in acusing me of cutting class and sends me to her office. SHE CALLED ME A MINIPULATIVE SPOLIED BRAT AND MY PARENTS A MINIPULITIVE BABIES! she also told me that i never heard the word no and thats why i have so many pets because my parents spoil me and thats why im cryingn because they said no art. THATS NOT TRUE….THE REASON WHY I HAVE SO MANY PETS IS BECAUSE IN THE 5TH GRADE I WAS BULLIED AND WAS ABOUT TO COMMIT SUISIDE SO I RESCUSED A LIZARD AND STARTED OPENING UP TO IT. WHEN MY PARENTS SAW THAT ANIMALS WERE SAVING ME, THEY BOUGHT ME ALOT OF THEM AND I STILL HAVE SOME OF THEM TODAY!!!!!!!!!.
she left me alone for 10 minutes and i wrote a note to my self as a stradigy to calm my self down. the letter stated every thing that happened and how i got permission to stay in the art room and wasnt cutting class. then she took me to the other school to ask the teachers a question to see if they had something to do with want happened. i asked her if she wanted to read the letter i wrote my self and refused. then she screamed at me in the middle of the street saying that shes a very confident woman and will not take my bulling. people were staring at me like i was a criminal. then when she found out that i got permission from the teachers to go to art, she screamed at all of them. the teachers were mad at me because maari acused them of letting me stay there two periods. the teachers thought i lied and told maarii that. i told the teachers that she acused them and never read my letter and never let me tell my side of the story. there fore i didnt lie.
that was the last day i returned to school. i didnt sleep for 9 days straight and had emotional breakdowns in the middle of the night on my hallway floor and had a nervous break down from sleep deprived at the doctors office. my dad would never send me back to that school even if i didnt get excepted into another special school. luckly i did!
i think the whole world should no to never send there kid here….it is a prision chamber!!! this school did me more harm then good emotionally. plus theres no education. unfortiontly the teachers have to follow her rules and are forced to yell at the kids and shut the kids up for every little thing because if they dont, then maari will fire them. thank you for reading this, i hope this chages your mind about tcs
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